I hadn't felt the need to join before. It was only ever meant to be a temporary thing this cancer-his ill health. I've always been the sick one. Too many autoimmune disorders etc. Jan 2023 he had the diagnosis adenocarcinoma. Rounds of Drs visits February Radiotherapy. Daily for a week. Easy. Chemotherapy came next. 4 months April May June and July finally the operation was scheduled for his Bowel resection. Visits to the hospital with young children. School runs Dropping the teenager to work, working myself. Yay I got through. Became ill myself over Christmas Then the children were ill contracted measles. Then came the planned lung resection. Feb delayed to March. He Got through it easily. End of April he tells me he found a lump in groin. I check yes definitely and not good (I have some clinical knowledge) scans arranged 8 more nodule on his lung 2 on his liver and his groin. All glowing on the Pet scan.
No longer curable. May be six months may be 4 years. How do I tell the kids what do I tell them when do i tell them. I am beyond distraught at this point. I want to curl up go to sleep and awake from this nightmare
Financially we will be ok but mentally Im not sure. I'm grieving already and I can't do this for an unknown amount of time. My support network was him. I will be losing my support, my husband and my children will lose Daddy.
Hi J1976
Sorry to read about what you have gone through and well done for reaching out on here. It took me a long time to reach out for any support and of course friends can be well meaning but often people can feel awkward even mentioning cancer.
Perhaps the first step might be looking at Your feelings when someone has cancer - I know I can pretty much go down that list as something of a tick box. I did a living with less stress course that really helped me to recognize those emotions and accept them as valid and by that help them end up being less overwhelming. You might also like to look at a blog on anticipatory grief
Then for your children you might like to look at our page on talking to children and teenagers, We were lucky to in that we got great support from our son's school and it was so helpful that our son got the same answer for all the trusted adults in his life.
<<hugs>>
Steve
