I'm a complete mess at the moment, we found out today my mum cancer has spread to other organs. We were told originally that its anal cancer and radio therapy and chemo will sort it but today we were told different.
I feel awful, here is me in a state when my mum is having to come to terms that she can't be cured.. I got kids and I cant bring myself to tell them, I hate lying to them but I'm in too much of a state to try and be strong for them. I just don't know what to do I honestly don't think I can get through this. I know I shouldn't be thinking about myself the only person that matters is my mum. Is lucky she has both my brothers living with her so they can support her, I can't as I got the kids I'm left on my own to deal with it myself. My mental health had just gone to a new lower level didn't think it could get any worse. I don't know what to do
Hi Stitch 0206
We often describe a cancer diagnosis as like a tsunami so your reaction is really perfectly normal - as is the "I have to be strong" line - I just wish is was as easy to do as it is to type.
My wife's cancer is very different - Leiomyosarcoma - and she could not be cured even from the point of diagnosis. However after two types of chemotherapy her cancer is stable - and we will take that and have done so for the last ten years.
How old are your children and are they close to your mum? Children can be really good at picking up on issues and their imagination can make things seem even worse than they really are, I wonder if this might help you all.
One of the things I struggled with was that our son has autism and I was very conscious of not talking about cure. For me talking to Maggies and Macmillan has been really helpful.
<<hugs>>
Steve
