My husband was diagnosed with gallbladder cancer in April 2022. In September this year we were told he had a very few months, if not weeks left. He has been under palliative care since and just before Christmas they told us they would do everything they could to get him to see our first grandchild. She was born in December and we have been fortunate enough to meet her several times and enjoy a lovely Christmas.
Three weeks ago he deteriorated and stopped eating completely and was barely drinking. They put him on a syringe driver and told us he was coming to the end. I've taken time off work to be with him. But, surprisingly, he has rallied and made a recovery of sorts. He's started eating a bit, sleeping much less and seems quite well.
I know this is amazing news and I am truly grateful. But I'd prepared myself emotionally for him going and now he's back. He's refusing to use the hospital bed and is asking me to take him out. I'm don't know whether I'm coming or going. Should I go back to work? What's going to happen next? I'm constantly living on a knife edge. I know he's never going to fully recover and I feel so guilty for wondering how long this torture is going to go on for because I love him and know life will never be the same without him.
Bec x
Hi Summer68
A great many people on here use the term rollercoaster and certainly I can see how things are going for you. When I did a living with less stress course one of the things I learnt was to try not to look too far ahead. We all tend to think we know what will happen next in life in general but really nobody actually knows. There is a saying I quite like - yesterday is history, tomorrow a mystery, today is a gift that is why we call it the present.
I know how much my wife added to my life, though living with her cancer has made life more challenging but I am so glad when I needed I found the help I needed.
<<hugs>>
Steve
