Caring for father whilst dealing with own health

Hello  NITuaisc 

I’m Steph and I’m part of the Online Community Team here at Macmillan. May I wish you another warm welcome to the Community, although I’m sorry that circumstances bring you here.

I was sorry to read about everything you’re going through with your father's cancer, your mother's mental health and your own health battles. I hope you will find it helpful to talk about how you're feeling here in the Community. By responding here, we'll bump your post up the forum so that more people see it and will have the opportunity to respond. 

You're finding caring difficult due to the flares you're experiencing. It's really positive that you're looking for tips to better deal with this. I wondered what other support you have around you right now?

We'd encourage you to speak to your GP, so they can help you access some support for both long covid and for you as a carer. We have some information about practical support for carers that you might find it helpful to have a read through.

We'd also encourage you to give our Support Line a call so you can talk everything through and access further support.  Our Support Line teams are available 7 days a week, 8am-8pm on freephone 0808 808 00 00, email or live webchat.

We have some more information here to help support you when your loved one has cancer.

I hope you find the support you’re looking for. Please do let us know if you have any questions or need further support with anything at all. I hope the Community helps to show you that you don’t have to go through this alone.

Kindest Regards,

Steph - Online Community Officer

Hi NITuaisc, sorry to hear about your situation.

I'm glad Steph replied with that information. It's really important to emphasise that you needn't do it alone, so please do speak to the GP and/or Adult Social Services.

I wonder if you have a blue badge or other eligibility, as there could be a 'Dial and Ride' service in your area that you could use instead of driving?

Maybe you could set a schedule too (for example, "I'll be here Monday, Wednesday and Friday this week")? Or stay overnight for a couple of days if that's possible? Would it be possible for you to go for a nap whilst you're there? Anything to reduce the time and energy sap from driving.

Please remember, though, although you're the 'only child', you have Long Covid! It's not that you can't be bothered, it's a whole thing, so please stand up for yourself and say when you need a break.

There are organisations that can help. Having the conversations to "let helpers in the door" can be hard and take a lot of energy; however, it can be the best option for everyone.

I hope others have suggestions for you. Look after yourself x