My husband has stage 4 lung cancer, diagnosed in May 2021. Has been off all treatment since this summer and feels better for it, latest prognosis is that he has 18 months left at the most, with secondaries sometime within the next year.
I have always been fit and healthy and able to take on all household tasks and driving, etc during difficult times (such as when he was having treatment). Three months ago I developed a health condition whuch has caused a lot of pain and which has really incapacitated me. My GP also says that in order for the condition to resolve itself, I must do absolutely nothing until at least pain free for 2 weeks. I cannot see the end of this as even doing things like being a passenger in a car sets things back to square one.
I am in a continuous state of panic about this - my husband is OK just now so has been able to take on all the household tasks, driving, etc. I also has a huge amount of emotion in me caused by time ticking on whilst I spend each day perched uncomfortably on the sofa. We had our first holiday in August after shielding for 3 1/2 years and had booked another one in the Autumn which we had to cancel because of my health. I am really mourning the loss of good quality last time together and feel really rubbish about the fact that my husband is spending valuable time shopping, cooking, etc. The pain has been wearing my resilence down.
I can't see how I will be able manage things when my husband goes downhill, and this is causing me the worst worry. We don't know anyone locally, our nearest friends are 2 hours drive away. Any thoughts from anyone about how I can make the next year manageable?
Have you both had a need assessment and a carers assessment - https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/social-care-and-support-guide/help-from-social-services-and-charities/getting-a-needs-assessment/ - that would be a first step in getting some support that should help you both.
<<hugs>>
Steve
