Completely isolated and dealing with husband's cancer

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I live in the Hungarian countryside and have no friends my husband was diagnosed with upper oesophageal cancer and he had chemotherapy and 33 rounds of radiation. We don't know if it worked as he has a peg but I am so petrified. I can't sleep and I feel guilty leaving his side for a minute. He is fine basically but I am so lost. He finished radiation on July 16 and next week we will try to let him sip some water. 

  • Hi  

    Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.

    Sorry to hear about what you are going through and glad you found us even if most of us are a bit distant. Something I found quite helpful was looking at your feelngs when someone has cancer as being able to recognize the emotions and accept them as normal and valid helped me be a little less overwhelmed.

    Hopefully with the end of radiation things might start to feel a bit more normal though the effects from the treatment are likely to continue for a while.

    Never actually been to Hungary, I wonder if there might be anyone else on here, you might like to have a look in Living with cancer outside the UK forum as much of the information here has a very UK bias.

    <<hugs>>

    Steve

    Community Champion Badge

  • Thank you so much for your reply. I am absolutely devastated about his illness. We have lived a very clean life or what I thought was clean. No red meat, no smoking limited alcohol and regular health checks. I am Hungarian/ Australian and my husband is Japanese. I am 56 and he is 84. I have known him since I was 21 and I feel my world crumbling. I can't breath. He looks well on some days yet I know ... Thank you again for hearing me 

    • My partner has been diagnosed with a brain tumour and had surgery to remove as much of it as possible. He has never smoked, drinks 1 can of Budweiser a week, and used to go to the gym every day. It’s so unfair, why does cancer target your lovely sounding husband when he’s lived as healthily as possible, same as my partner. I just can’t make any sense of it
  • Dear Maureen,

    I am so sorry to hear about your partner. It is truly heartbreaking and indigestible that we stick to a healthy life and these things can happen. I hope he has a good recovery. What else I found strange is how people abandoned me. Friends I loved and stood by for years found the nerve to point out every issue they ever had with me. Besides being completely shattered by my husband's illness I have learned that we never really know people until we do? Thank you again for your words.