New Member Looking For Support

Hi Mzz, We are also new here my husband is still having tests to determine if cancer is only in the lungs and nymph node or anywhere else and I got to say its the not knowing that is killing me,. My husband always has dealt with things and moved on, probably the exact opposite of myself and that is why he is also my world.  We celebrated 40 years this year and I am a strong believer that love grows, so if you spent 18 years together I can assure you there is definitely love there.  I think you're doing a brilliant job in a very dark time and wish you much luck and strength.

Thank you for the words of encouragement. Yes I love him very much and am going to fight with him through this. Yesterday was a very rough day. I’ve got a doctors appointment for him this morning and feel revived and a bit more positive. I am in this for the long haul. Sickness and in health. Congratulations on 40 years!! And yes the not knowing is very difficult. We are awaiting the imuno test results that were taken but not added to his health chart. We too will know more in a week or so. Either way the doctor is confident that chemotherapy and immunotherapy will be the direction. I am sending you positive vibes for your husbands results. Let me know how things go. I enjoy learning about the different processes as this is all very new to me. Thank you. 

Hi Mizz, I will keep you updated and you I.  Thank you for the positive vibes lol, I also send them back to you lol. All the Best:)

Hi Mzz.

Not  so good today, he had the results of his MRI which shows 3 brain tumours, so he has lung, nymph node cancer  and now brain tumours.  His biopsy is tomorrow and the Consultant hopes to get the results and see us next Wednesday but she thinks he is already in stage 4, which means it should still be treatable  but not curable.  Starting to wonder if its worth being positive.  I normally pick myself up well after most things, but this is devastating me slowly. Sincerely hope that you can make my day by having some good news:)

Things took a turn for the absolute worst after my husband had his pet scan Saturday that Monday I received a call from the doctors nurse advising that my husband had pneumonia and they wanted to make sure he did not have Covid because he was starting chemotherapy that Friday. I went out Monday and got a Covid test for him which he came back negative for, however that Monday my husband‘s breathing changed drastically, he was breathing through his chest and fighting for air Tuesday. I went to work but left early not feeling like something was right. I called the oncologist and wanted to see if they could get him in for an emergency visit  due to his breathing. The nurse advised it would be best if I just took him to the emergency room based off the breathing symptoms. So around noon once I got home from work, I rushed him to the emergency department. Only to find that his respirations were at 34 a normal person they should be 100% . So he was not getting enough oxygen into his lungs. This was a drastic and utter change in my husband as he was just shopping the Saturday prior in town with me walking around, laughing joking, etc.. His heart stopped seven hours after I got him to the emergency department  and I have not been on for a few days because I have been trying to digest all of what has taken place. The reason for his death states acute respiratory failure, multiple pulmonary embolism‘s lung cancer and lung disease over the course of the last seven weeks and three days  since going to the emergency room the very first time on September 17 after all the tests, the MRIs, the CT scans pet scans, you name it none of those doctors ever said anything about lung disease and that is what took my husband out. It was so disturbing to see him fighting for air , I can’t get this picture out of my mind. I know that he struggled to remain strong for me and our children. I just wanted to give an update I hope and pray you have a great turn out and your loved ones outcome. This is devastating. 

I can't begin to tell you how sad I feel for you Mzz, roller coaster ride would be a walk in the park as opposed to this disease, how quickly our worlds can change.  I have never been frightened of anything but loosing him and this Cancer truly terrifies me.  I don't know what  to say to you, as I don't think there are any words.  Please feel free to drop me a line.  I will respond.

Thinking of you

LIsa

I am truly sorry to hear your devastating news. It's the not knowing that gets to you. Look after yourself and hope you find some peace 

Thanks for responding. And yes the not knowing was painful. I’m left with thinking about all of the what if’s (what if I never would’ve driven him to the hospital, what if he never called for help, what if we never separated). I’m preparing for his memorial service tonight and I have had a great support from friends and family. I have to be honest and say that I knew deep down our time was limited. In this I find solace in the time we shared together and the love we shared until the very end. And that this strong man is finally at peace and no longer in pain. 

Thanks so very much for your kind words and compassion. 

I’m so sorry to hear your devastating news. My husband has just gone into a hospice, and is end of life after a rollercoaster 18 months of pain, fear and sadness, he is only 55. We too were separated until his diagnosis, and I cry when i think of the wasted years. I’m not sure what I’ll do without him. 
sending love x