Letter Nature Take it's Course

I’m just sending you both a big hug, filled with lots of strength.

This cancer journey isn’t easy at all !!

The descion couldn’t have been easy for him to make, but at least at home he is surrounded with love..

my thoughts are with you both xx

Hi

just wanted to send you a huge virtual hug. I get it. It's beyond hard.

My husband was passed across from the oncologist to the local palliative care team at the end of Feb 2023. He was diagnosed with a stage 4 brain tumour in Sept 2020 and after surgery and 6 weeks of treatment, made the decision in Jan 2021 to let nature take its course. In Feb this year the oncologist said there was no point in doing any more maintenance scans and indicated that he had a few weeks,, a couple of months at best. It felt like he'd washed his hands of us. Seven months down the line, he's still with us.

Like you, we've been together 35 years...its a lifetime. 

His tumour has pretty much "stolen" the person he was from us and most days now it feels like I'm living with a very broken stranger. 

You're right though. There is joy to be found in every day and cats are a great source of support. I'd be lost without my furry boys.

Stay strong. 

love n hugs

Wee Me xx

HI - I want to send a hug to you as well.  I'm also on the same journey through husbands cancer (bile duct for mine). I too am dreading the future and watching him die a little bit more every day.  Mine has almost given up eating, gets very cold and only wants to lay down.  Unfortunately we don't have a cat and no longer have a dog but we are still trying like you to find joy in life.  Sharing things on here helps too. It's good to know you are not alone.

Clancy

Hi Summer 68

I am in a  similar position my partner who was for and well about 2 months ago was diagnosed with end stage lung cancer that has spread everywhere you can think of  He was admitted to hospital 2 weeks ago due to high calcium levels   And we are hoping he can come home tomorrow It is the hardest thing to endure it is  almost   to much to bear 

It is wonderful you can find some joy in the everyday and this what I am truly hoping for 

I send you lots of love and strength 

Jane

Firstly I'd like to send a massive virtual hug to you all. I logged in tonight to find some comfort and strength in this living nightmare and soul destroying journey and this thread was exactly what I was looking for so thank you for sharing your very personal and very painful journeys. My husband of 24 years has terminal stomach cancer and is deteriorating very quickly. He wants to be home when he dies and I will do my utmost to make that happen but I'm terrified of the reality of that. I'm still in shock that I'm going to have to live my life without  my beautiful strong once invincible husband. The pain is unbearable and I am broken. 

I am sorry you are going through this journey too.  I too find it so difficult to adjust to the fact that the man I relied on, who always knew what to do and what to say, who was so strong, gentle and kind is slipping away from me one moment at a time and now I have to be the strong one.  It's so hard because I am trying to be strong, do the things that are necessary yet screaming inside that I can't cope. However I do and so does everyone else on this awful journey.

Please take a virtual hug

Clancy

You have so eloquently put into words what we are all feeling. 

It’s so hard to be strong all the time. And even harder when they go….

Im sending you love.

Thank you.  I am dreading the time I will finally be in my own.   Sending love to you too. 

We have had a visit from the Doctor at the hospice this week which has made it all seem so real. My husband also wants to die at home and I will try my hardest to make that happen although it also terrifies me. Every day he seems a little bit weaker and is sleeping more and more and doing less. It's like he's slowly slipping away, but there are times he seems like his old self and I forget for a bit and feel normal again.

I know the coming weeks and months are going to be the hardest of my life and I am trying so hard to stay strong. Our son is getting married in four weeks and our first grandchild is due at the beginning of December, but I can't look forward to these life events because it's looking increasingly likely my husband won't be here to enjoy them.

Reading these posts and knowing I'm not alone gives me a lot of comfort.

My heart goes out to everyone who is on this painful journey as well xx

Oh my heart goes out to you too.  At a time you should be looking forward with hope and happiness you are left with sadness. Sending a virtual hug