Don’t know what to do

  • 3 replies
  • 44 subscribers
  • 401 views

One of my parents was diagnosed with a glioblastoma recently and quickly lost a lot of function. I’ve been trying to work full time and support my other parent and brother with the care. The carers come three times a day but they still tend to him constantly. I feel like I’m failing as a daughter, sister and a partner. I want to take time off work to do more but I would have to take a pay cut to do so which we can’t afford. I feel so isolated from the caring, and from work, and from my partner. Everyday brings fresh anxiety and I don’t think people at work understand. I feel awful for thinking about myself in this time. 

  • Can I make a suggestion? This may not work in your case, but as someone who's been doing the caring for my husband, what I would have welcomed would be respite. Accepting that your work means you are not available to do the bulk of the caring, offer to step in for specific times - an evening each week or a few hours each weekend, to allow your other parent/brother to step away from care tasks to take a walk in the park or some other hobby/down time. Helping them to keep doing what they are doing may be the best contribution you can make right now, and will help you to feel that you are doing your part. 

    Cancer treatments March 2021 - October 2023

  • But I feel like they need more help too. We try to share it between us, and he's already doing most of it as our mum isn’t very strong. 

  • Also, thank you for replying :)