Hi S67, I have a 14 year old daughter with ADHD so struggles with her emotions and expressing her emotions. Her dad was diagnosed with pancreatic Cancer in September. I tried to explain that she does not have to think about what to say or how to say it and that we won’t take offence to what she says.
i told my daughter that I also find it hard too and sometimes don’t know what to say.
i have suggested talking to another family member or she can text me or write me a Note and I will try me best to answer or if I don’t know will be honest with her.
i personally think anger is a stage of this and next week it might be sadness or nervousness about waiting for the results.
Hi chrissie, thank you so much for replying. Sorry to hear about your husband’s cancer. Your suggestions of a txt or a letter/note are a great idea. Thank you.
It’s so hard isn’t it to deal with things ourselves & be there for our children isn’t it. I’ve said similar to my daughter about msybe not having answers sometimes. Think it’s good to show we are working through things aswell.
Your defiantly right, we are trying to manage our emotions on a day to day basis too but also need to be there for friends and family. My dad really struggles and does not want to hear about the hard bits and his mum is very much like pull your pants up have a cry and get in with it. Every one just wants to be positive, of course I want to be too but I have three children that I need to protect if it does not go the way we want it too. I have a daughter just gone to Uni who is struggling because she is not here and feels isolated so far away , my 14 yo daughter and a 12 year old son who is doing ok at the moment. i have been fine since September but the last week has been very hard with not sleeping and headaches so I’ve taken two weeks of full time work. Im 43 and just stuggling to think that I might be left on my own with the kids, we have been married nearly 25 year which is along time.
i do try to take one day at a time but I’m abit of a Planner and in the worldof cancer nothing gets planned it’s all last minutes appointments and test Which I find really stressful.
When do you think you will get your test results back?
Gosh everything you have said I can relate to. Do you have anyone you can talk honestly to? Anyone you can truly tell your emotions to, that’s what I find hardest…feeling the need to be positive, which I am mostly but, like you, worrying about losing my husband. A rollercoaster every day!!
Like you, my eldest son has just moved away to a new job, he’s 26, & is struggling with not being around now. Always worrying about the kids, no matter what age is tough! I’m 56 with twin boys, 26, & my daughter, 16. My dad has dementia so isnt really ‘there’ anymore as the dad I used to be close to & my mum is like yours, ‘have a good cry, & then you’ll feel better’!
Really hoping for a phonecall to agree an appt date this week but as you said it doesn’t work that way. The waiting game is the WORST! My husband’s cancer journey has been since last October & we still are not at treatment stage. Test after test after test. sorry for the essay…good to talk/txt.
Better get up & on with the day! Here anytime you want to rant, moan…..
Have you been assigned a Clinical nurse specialist Sur? Maybe give her a call and ask what’s going on and when you can expect a clinic date. Our one is very good and really helps us out. Just got back from bloods this morning with the hope his chemo is tomorrow( platelets we’re down last week so chemo was cancelled last minute so waiting on a telephone call this afternoon to confirm.
Sue honestly if you would like a chat give me a message. Happy to chat or moan too
Really hope you get a call today. we haven’t been been assigned a specialist nurse yet, just been told that’s it’s fast growing cells so bone scan needed.
