Feeling lonely and unhappy.

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Hi everyone,

It's been over a year since my partner was diagnosed with a Grade 4 Glioblastoma Brain tumour just before lockdown in 2020. He had an operation to remove the tumour, however, a small section remains to this day. After a round of Chemo and Radiotherapy, I've tried to keep things flowing looking after him. I gave up work to be with him during this difficult time and I'm now his full-time carer as he's suffering from the effects of the steroids and other medication he's currently on.

To cut a long story short, I'm asking anyone here if they can give me insight into how they coped caring for someone in similar circumstances- The eg. mood swings, aggressiveness, and what seems to be unable to recognize my struggle whilst absorbing this behavior.

I feel I can only get some answers from someone who's experienced this and has tools for me to feel less stressed and unhappy.

His family are very limited in their support and I feel they should be more involved (I've tried )- albeit it's been difficult recently with Covid restrictions. Left feeling alone, disappointed, undervalued and

wondering when this becomes lighter.

Thank you for reading this.

Kind regards

FormerMember over 3 years ago

I know how you feel. My partner has been going through some thing similar for sometime.

Remembering, whilst they are ranting at me, that is not personal, even though all the words they say are, is hard but does help. You are just the person that is always there when they are having a bad time.

We cannot talk about it at the time but sometimes long afterwards when they are calmer and happier we do. Finding the right time to talk about how you feel with them is tricky...

When they are in that mood stopping myself from reacting negatively is so hard but with practise I am getting there - but I certainly do not feel immune to it, if I ever do then I will think it is because I no longer care - which is something I do not want.

My partners family are all overseas so literally cannot help others than the odd phone call..but even that helps.

Others will have better advice. You are not alone in this. Macmillan have people you can talk to, so do other charities - I spent a good hour a few months ago talking to someone in Hospital carpark whilst she was having treatment - I felt better afterwards, but cannot remember which organisation they were from.

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