Living alone with cancer

So sorry you have so much on your plate.  Please know that you are not alone.  One distraction for me is knitting. .and just received a new order of yarn!  Another distraction I use is my photography.  Camera is  my hand erases all other thoughts for a time.  walks are also good.  I keep my phone off so I can enjoy the sounds of nature.   I hope you find your special niche~

Brian...could you please direct me to the bladder cancer forum.  Thanks so much!

Sorry you're having a bad time with it. I'm just the opposite and embraced dealing with cancer alone. It is more comfortable for me and easier to think and deal with.

Hello Den64 

I am so sorry to read of your problems and can't start to understand how you feel. 

Most of the time there's someone about on the General Chat thread and here's the link to that:

 Awake and up all night 

Don't let the title put you off, the thread is in use day and night.

Have you considered calling our Support Line to chat about your stress - they are great at putting your mind at ease - 0808 808 00 00 (8am to 8pm 7 days a week) and it's a free call.

Something else we can do for you here at Macmillan is to get you a "telephone buddy" - someone to call you once a week and you can chat about whatever's on your mind, cancer - shopping, TV - it's up to you - link here:

Macmillan Telephone Buddies.

I hope the above helps.

Best wishes - Brian.

I know i know......you can message me .

    I say I know because I know how you feel .

      Please do not talk about yourself as getting kicked off for moaning because you need compassion .

    Today ive driven myself potty with overthinking and it is incredibly frustrating...like an endless trap .

      Message me I will listen as I can resonate .

      I have ovarian cancer and it has spread .

     Don't ever ever say you'll get kicked off for moaning...because thats why people are in this ...including you .

     Sometimes in your sphere everyone seems to not grasp it and a few people come out with pathetic empty support .

      I know !

      Here is a big hug in the meantime x

Awwwh ! I have just read your post and I felt i wanted to message you .

      It got to my heart and made me cry is there  social services to help even a little bit .

    I have advanced  ovarian cancer and I wish I could help you .

      I can imagine you with your kind of stratergy coping  routine ...

       I guess telling someone youre thinking of them is kind of empty support from me just writing this like this .

       I have one lifelong  good friend (altho I know alot of people ) and without her id never thought about this but dignitas went through my mind. 

    She gives me strength to go on and I waa there for her miscarriages and still birth many years ago when she didnt want to live .

      If you feel which I am sure you do thats theres no one  at times ...message me ! 

        Here is a big hug 

You need compassion and a break ...dont we all on here eh !

     X

Hello Lilyiris 

Apologies for the delay in my reply - I have been off line for a while, however I see you have found the bladder cancer group and wish you well with your personal journey.

Iris is a fantastic name - it's the name of my latest grandchild! ,

Best wishes - Brian.

I understand that !! X

So I was diagnosed with stage 3 cancer at 18. Ovarian Cancer, immature teratoma. At the time, it looked like I was pregnant and all my family shunned me. Went as far as refusing to take me to get my cancer looked at by a professional or any medical care. I had my boyfriend, and I use that term loosely, take me to the ER, and they did a cat scan and booked an operation 2 weeks later. It was 13.5lbs and 4 liters of cancerous fluid. Then came 5 rounds of chemo. I was in the best shape of my life at 143lbs and went to 288 a year later after chemo. I think the depression and cancer drugs doubled my weight. Today, I still haven't come to grips on that isolating experience where my family would not believe me when I told them I wasn't pregnant and it was cancer. Now, my niece has stage 4 cancer, Hodgkin's lymphoma and I can't help feel like she is drowning in support and my experience was completely invalidated. I wish someone would tell me how to sort out a betrayal of that magnitude by all my close and extended family, and move on with my life. Yes, I forgive them for the most part, but I still feel like most of my family doesn't care about me, or at least, only cares enough for short phone calls, a text message once a year, that kind of thing. I feel like reaching out to new people or forming close relationships after this has been hard if not impossible. I've just tried to stay in survival mode, staying in school, working at work and I feel like my own children will ghost me and each other the same way someday. I want to stop thinking like this, but it's hard. 

I live alone and have secondary lung cancer. On my Facebook page I keep getting photos of people in the section below, which really upset me. I absolutely feel for these people who are going through the same thing, but it's hard to see distressing photos as this will be me in future. Should I feel this way?