7 days post diagnosis - mum with 2 under-10s

Hi VeraZzz 

I am sorry you are going through this and don’t have a lot of family support around you. It’s too early to tell what your treatment path will be but not all ER+ cancers need chemo. Recovery time from surgery will depend on what operation you have, but I was back to normal within a few days of a wide local excision plus sentinel node biopsy. Radiotherapy can be tiring but many people only have 5 days of treatment. So this might all resolve without a huge need for time off work. 

This page has information for contacting MacMillan including their financial advisors https://www.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-information-and-support/get-help

You might also find it helpful to join our main Breast cancer forum which tends to be busier than this one. 

Wishing you all the best. 

Hi, I’m 39 and was diagnosed at the end of march. I had a hormone positive HER negative cancer and my 3.6cm tumour removed and a bilateral mammoplasty. I too have young children (5,7 and 9). I start chemo in a couple of weeks followed by radiotherapy and ribociclib and hormone therapy for 10 years. My tumour was grade 3 so my oncotype suggested chemo (27) … the best advice I can give to you is to take one step at a time. We have really come a long way in treating breast cancer and its recurrence and whilst it is scary and you will naturally worry about the children enjoy the days you have as much as you can. I’ve been doing more with them, speak to work and see what assurances you can get around your sick pay. You may not even need chemo but if you do there are lots of positive accounts about the management of the side effects and the cycles having good and bad days and even weeks. This is not a straight path there will be hurdles, but you have a supportive husband to lean on. Process those emotions, cry when you need to, write down your worries but have a second book for writing down your hopes and logging good days and positive feelings. I wrote a letter to my cancer when I was ready and it responded with aggression ha (chemo grade 3) it knocked me for 6 but I’ve now written again and feel like I’m back in control. Go for walks get out in the fresh air. It may be a bit much for you but nature helps me, hug a tree with the kids, teach them about the beauty of the simple things. If you’re anything like me pre cancer we as busy working mums missed so much. Take this as a chance to slow down a little and focus on you a bit more. I too am the breadwinner but there is help out there if you are unable to work due to physical or mental illness even if you are on ssp you could try pip?  Another thing I’ve found helpful is watching things that make me laugh. Like really laugh. This didn’t come easy I’m nearly two months post diagnosis it was a process. Trust that process. Lean into the children with your time and know that most people survive this long term. That’s the truth. Wishing you the very best, stay strong, but not all the time ha  xx

Nadine you are lovely, thank you for reaching out. In the past couple of days I've connected with some wonderful women, including you, who are showing me there is a path to walk and a direction to focus on. I know I can beat it, and I know that this is the worst part of it all - the wait. My MRI is tomorrow and that's my next step to focus on. Please be in touch if you'd like to. Good luck with your chemo! I hope you have a strong network around you - in any case call em all in! <3

Hi i understand ckmpletley how u feel my son is 13 and going through secondry school when i was diagnosed , im currently going through chemo now .Always happy to chat