Just diagnosed at 39 - any advice greatly welcome!

This chat is an absolute gem. I will let you know next week how it went. Xx

Hi. I hope things are going well in your life. I m just about to have my third cycle and getting to know my body how it responds to it. On the whole I can't complain. I was thinking about you recently. How are you?! Aga xx

Hi Aga! 
I am about to have my 4th cycle on Tuesday which is my last one of this chemo and then I go onto a different one weekly for 9-12 weeks. 
I also cannot complain, I have been ok. I’ve lost all my hair but that’s ok and I’ve noticed that some people look at me when I’m out but I’m getting used to that. 
how are you feeling about everything? 
will you have surgery after the chemo? Xx

I m glad you are doing so well and treatment is kind to you. I still got 4 cycles of chemo to go which takes us till October, then operation and some radio. I m still using cold cap, I can see my hair is thinning but I can still do a ponytail. I feel lucky with little side effects however I m aware things might get more challenging further down the line. I find harder to make my head busy and not to Google things, I know I will get upset but reading things up. Xx

Are you still working? Try and stay away from google but I know it’s hard. Do you have a good speciality nurse working with you that you can ask any questions to? X

I m signed off work, high risk of catching an infection like covid. I m doing online courses for work to keep my brain working, exercising every day, my kitchen is spotless ( even behind the cooker ), reading books like mad and seeing people when I can. Nurses are great, they phone me regularly. Very occasionally my brain switches the mode "what if" . Do you have it?! 

Yes I absolutely do but I try and only listen to my oncologist and my nurses and I ask a LOT of questions! Like can the cancer grow while I’m on chemo, what are my chances of it coming back etc etc and I want to know how this all medically works so I can’t get paranoid and let me mind worry about things that can’t physically happen. 
I lost my mother last week to very advanced ovarian cancer and I saw her die in the most horrific way due to a complication which was a bowel obstruction for 6 weeks. I’m getting some professional help but I saw my oncologist last week as of course I’m terrified of ovarian cancer and can my cancer turn into it etc etc so yes I worry about the “what ifs”

I want my ovaries out ASAP but this is not something I can do yet or need yet. My mother and I both had the genetics tests and came back negative so it’s pure coincidence this has happened to us and not genetic which is good x

I m so sorry about your mum. I can not imagine what you are going through now. Please accept my deepest condolences and virtual hug. I have lost my dad 6 years ago due to cancer and I haven't told mmum yet. I will do that very soon. I think I will ask few more questions next week when I see my consultant so my mind can settle. Thank you for finding time to talk to me.  xx

Thanks so much - I feel such a huge loss and no one was able to say goodbye as it was so violent and quick. She didn’t even have time to get the morphine syringe driver into play so had no pain relief really. 
can I ask what kind of questions you worry about? Your nurses will be a huge help and you must ask them anything you think of. No question is too small! X

It is hard enough to lose a parent, and for you even harder with what you are going through yourself plus covid. Unimaginable pain when someone you love didn't have enough support with medication and not having anybody around them. Getting professional help is so important for you wright now. I hope you get some inner peace soon. I know it is a process and takes time, it does get easier. My question that always upsets me is - will it come back?! I know I haven't even finished my treatment yet for this one but my mind is already in a future asking this question. That is why I don't want to Google things, I feel I might find things that will affect me and I will break. Xx