My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Helen I am sorry I missed your post. Poor Nat how awful for her. I hope she soon feels a litle better.  It is not easy when things remind you so much of such a tragic time is it?

Love and angelo hugs to you both x x x Patricia x x x

Oh Rosemary, I love the picture. I'll be right over coz I want a go in that boat and a drink of hot choc x x x

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Ahh Patirica we crossed in the post!  Glad the text got to you at the right time :-))  I was cleaning today and promised myself that I could text people once I had done each bathroom (inclucing the downstairs cloakroom) and you were my first person, although I have to admit that actually I sent that BEFORE I cleaned the first bathroom, maybe I knew you needed it sooner rather than later.  Hope you are feeling a bit brighter now and try hard not to feel sad about the photos as Ray was happy, he did enjoy those times and he will always be glad that you could share them, either with him or hearing about them.  You will get things sorted one day, meantime there's no rush xxxx

Karen sending you a special welcome hug, what an awful thing to have happened with your dear man (toy boy indeed, how lovely!) remember that you must give yourself time to come to terms with all of that, it's not just the losing them it's all we had to go through and see them go through that leaves a mental exhaustion as well as physical one and we have to try and come to terms in whatever way we can with everything as well as trying to pick ourselves up and live a life we hadn't planned.  As Patricia has said, you never need to apologise here, this is the place where everything and anything can be said, you let things out that you don't feel able in the outside world for fear of upsetting people or whatever reason, on here we "get it" and if nothing else it can be a release just to say it.

Well having successfully posted my picture on the other reply I now cannot remember all the things I wanted to say, so for now I will join flippers with Patricia, throw out the sparkly rope for those that need to hang on, pop others into the new penguin boat and get the fire going on the ledge - oh busy busy busy!  Lots of love to you all - oh and Sainsburys have Baileys on half price!!!!!  Tesco's have buy two litre bottles for £25 so all in all at least something is looking up - yes my glass is always half full, and if not it's just being refilled, thank you Ailsa (she knows I have a wobbly hand when it comes to pouring) xxxxxxxxxx

Tee hee Patricia, you can sit near the galley - do you mind being in charge of the toaster too?  Sailing can be hungry work! xx

Of course Rosemary, rather ironic really because wherever I go I always end up in the kitchen (oops I mean galley) lol.

I am glad to see you say your glass is always half full and not half empty. That shows a positive attitude. Yeaaaaa x x  x

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

oooooh!! Rosemary - large quantities of Baileys available?????  Hot choc????? Please may I have them both together in a very large mug........ummmm............ to warm my hands on??????? (it's too cold for Baileys over ice cream!!)

I was going to  post messages to each of you - but my brain has stopped functioning tonight - so will just say welcome to our new friends (though sad that we meet in this way) and leave lots of ((((hugs))))) for you all........

Dot xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Dot, huge (((((((((((((((((hugs)))))))))))))))))))))) for you and yours - any further news?  Have been thinking of you, dad and him indoors all day.

Karen, welcome , but sorry that you have needed to join this thread. what a traumatic time you have had.   One day, one hour, one minute at a time.... stay with us, keep posting.

Rosemary - you and your Bailey's!!    Am i the only person in the world who has never even tried it?  will have to remedy that, so shift over on the ledge, you and Patricia, this penguin is on the way.

xx

Right then Sue, I will budge up and you can have this nice warm spot. I hope you enjoy your Bailey's. I don't drink it myself so just having hot choc.

Dottee, come on, get yourself into the middle of the huddle or.... if you prefer, sit with Sue and be pampered.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x xx

Evening everyone.  I was so surprised this evening to read so much posting since I was on on Friday.  Lots of love to you all and welcome to Karen.  You have had a terrible experience so I hope we hear more from you.  I made loads of notes as I was reading but I am afraid that the long commute to & from work is getting to me.  I went straight from Bradford to pilates tonight.  The problem with working in that city is the temptation to go too early & stay too late to avoid traffic.  Thursday should be my last day there for a while so maybe by then I will be feeling less tired.  Being tired makes me miss Chris even more.  I need to get off to bed but just need to send Gayle big hugs and hope that the nasty lady was out of the house today and that Gayle and the little ones can get moved in and settled.  Take care everyone and I will try a bit harder tomorrow to catch up with you all.  Ailsa xxx

Hello everyone,

I don't pop in for a couple of days and now I can't keep up!  Welcome to Karen, I am so so sorry for your loss and in such tragic circumstances and having to wait on an inquest.  Sending you large hugs.  Judi, great to have you back - you need to make use of that office! :)  Helen, I'm sorry Nat is still poorly.  I had quincy when I was about 21 (abcess on tonsils) and it was awful but I landed in hospital getting it drained and IV antibiotics.  I hope the trip to the doctor sorts it and she doesn't need further treatment.  The only positive was that I ended up getting my tonsils out after that (after been waiting for years) and now I never get a sore throat and I lost a stone lol.  Patricia, it is this time of year which makes us lonely.  I have been feeling it a lot too and almost went to the crematorium yesterday but stopped myself as I knew it would send me spiralling further down.  Hugs to Pam and Rosemary, Linda, Dot, Ailsa (thank goodness your commute is stopping this week and thanks for the thoughts!), Lynne and everyone else as my mind has now gone blank :)

Well I have had a phonecall to say she is gone!!!!  I am just waiting on a further phonecall to confirm I can collect the keys tomorrow morning.  What a relief although I am dreading finding the energy over the next 2 weeks to do the move but just can't wait to be settled with my boys in our new house.  I have been so low over this and obviously splitting up with my boyfriend and everything else in between that I think I hit rock bottom but hopefully things are on the up now.  I have come away for a couple of days with my ex to Aberdeen and we have sorted quite a lot out.  Its never going to be right but I know that he loves me and that when I am with him I forget all my worries and I am actually happy - truly genuinely happy.  I will probably fall back to earth again with a bump in a couple of days but for now I am enjoying it and once he goes away on Thursday I will be too busy with the move to think about him anyway. 

So I better go as I need to do some work while he is at meetings.

Take care penguins and I will keep you posted with hopefully a big message saying "I GOT MY KEYS!!!"

Gayle xxx