My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Hot choc sounds good Rosemary - so I for one will join you on your ledge.........But no Baileys????  What is the world coming to??  The best I can offer is 'Bottlegreen Pomegranate and Elderflower Cordial' - sorry but it doesn't ferment in the bottle!!!!!  Hey ho!!  No need to hide just now - so will admire the stars between the clouds...........xxxx

Good evening, fellow penguins.  I hope you've all had as good a day as possible. The weathwr has been glorious here in the dear old south west.

i had a very strange 'moment' this morning. As I was lying in bed in a semi-comatose state, procrastinating about getting up (as usual), I was half-dreaming. In my half dream, Alan came upstairs, came into the bedroom and gave me a kiss on the cheek to wake me up. I swear that I felt it; I'm not given to flights of fancy as a rule, but this was so very real. As it happened, Bank Holiday Monday  tradition dictates that the whole family go to the local agricultural show. This had become the highlight of Alan's summer, and Alice and I have kept up the tradition, today being the second show that we have been to since he died.      If I hadn't been woken by the 'kiss' I should have been late, thereby missing one of the best parts of the show.     

Am I losing the plot?  I actually felt really shaken by it;   I~ think it was a good thing, but not entirely sure!

sue xx

Oh Sue - of course it was a 'good thing' and you've not lost any bit of the plot....just accept that Alan visited you for a brief moment of time and savour it.  You are and always will be surrounded by his love and may from time to time be 'visited' by him as proof of this.......

Love and comforting (((hugs)))

Dot xxxxxxxxx

Thanks, Dot - i can always rely on you to say exactly the right thing xx

ooooo i don't know about that!!!  But I did engage brain first this time lol!!!

Oh Sue how lovely, truly touched by an angel!  Losing the plot?  Who cares, let it be lost we might be happier that way! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

My darling Sue, absolutely no doubt from me hun - you was kissed!!  Since I had my 'dream' (and Dottee I do actually think of it as a visit) I am absolutely sure that one way or another it is exactly as Dottee says - maybe it is just that our love gets so, so concentrated that we 'make' it happen .... but if that is the case then so be it - it still 'happened' as far as I am concerned. 

But one thing I am afraid I can't join you with Dottee is your cordial!!!  even the word Bottlegreen just made me think of bluebottles  ... uckk! 

So my wonderful Rosemary, pull out a duvet for me (because we can't have me sitting on a COLD ledge can we ..... don't worry penguins, she will understand - rude, rude lady!!!) and stop hogging the hot chocolate, packing can wait until tomorrow, we will just watch the stars and blow kisses up to our lovers. 

Night night xxxxx

thank you xx

Sue, it must have been Alan as he didnt want you to be late, how wonderful for you, Little sis's hubby has had a really hard time since she went, and I have prayed for him to get  some help, sent him a book called Angels and he also started to pray for the first time in his life, he has now had Pat visit him on 3 occasions, and has been at peace ever since just to know he will see her again was the turning point for him. Glad you enjoyed the show and Alan managed to get you there on time. XX

I walk with so many of you and for this I'm sorry.

Can't tell my story at this moment but its been 19 months now but you guys are amazing in your own ways guess I just want to send those hugs out to you all.

Will try again soon

bye xx