My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Ok Patricia , well eat our plastic food together lol , unless Judi is offering her services lol . Lesley what a  demanding job hun , good luck with what ever you decide to do , i'm  sure everything will work out in the end . Fiona , you must have mixed feelings about Darren coming home , i'm sure you want him too but also want him to be doing what he wants to do , and like he says he has had a fantastic month and nobody can take that away . Esme , when is your purple hat , now you know any chance i have to dress up and i'm first there lol . Thank you for your latest instalments , i am really enjoing it , well done .. My brain is now exhausted , i'll be in my bed quite soon , i dont think tommorow will be as busy (hopefully ) Take care and hugs to all xxxxxxxx

Okay then - own up.  Who was it that heard me whispering to Lesley and told Patricia?  I said it was decades ago and I meant it and truth be told I wasn't really so very good - I had a few wonderful years and got to travel while conning people that very small, pretentiously presented portions were the 'done thing'! It was the 80s you know!.

Rosemary - you know me and hats - just try keeping me away.  I think it is a fabulous idea, Absolutely Fabulous in fact. So no Dottee there will be no Sham Pain it will be Bolly all the way!

Fiona you know what, Darren was away a whole month and you were amazing through that whole time, supporting him and encouraging him and that means that if he does decide to go again before his visa runs out you know that you can do it. 

Lynne, I am glad that they are continuing to look after your dad and seem to be carefully considering what care should be taken.  And stop working so hard!  At the moment 3.5 hours nearly constitutes a whole day's work for me!

Oh Gayle, Gayle, Gayle - what am I to do with you ......... No1. I don't want to hear that you have let that tank get down to a few drips in the bottom again. No 2. Everyone knows that it is a wee old mannie wearing a cloth cap who can harldy see over the steering wheel of his Morris Minor at the front of the queue. No3. Thank God for funny nozzles is all I can say!  Hope that today was better!

I have been taking a red marker to the 109 applications that have arrived looking for my job!  Severe culling to be done.  One of the oddest was the lady that thought she could do it from home (you need to remember here that I read for a blind professor) very loud voice needed I think ....... particularly as she lives in Dubai!!   Or,the,young,lady,that,put,commas,between,each,word,instead,of,a,space!  Or the very recently retired Headteacher who had been moonlighting on the nightshift at a taxi switchboard.  One question ..... WHY?

But my favourite moment today was when my funny Professor dug himself a hole.  Picture the scene:-

Judi "Oh here's a good one Julian, a decent CV and she started life as Cabin Crew so she may well add a little glamour to your day"

Prof "Oh no, I don't think so, Julie (wife) wouldn't like me working with someone glamorous every day"

I left it a couple of seconds to him think about the size of the insult he had just thrown my way before I laughingly replied "Compliments like that and you wonder why I am leaving!"  As he started to make things worse by saying "No I meant really glamorous........" the others in the office were shouting "Spade for the Prof please"  - "Oh I think a JCB would be better the way he is going"  Anyone think I need to find him someone with a sense of humour??

Am off to bed now, trying to get into good habits before I start fulltime.

Love to all, Hig Bugs and Helen ......... you'll be on holiday by the time you read this!

Judi xxx

Good idea Patricia, I love chinese food. I'm glad I'm not the only one with a stuffed freezer. I seem to spend an age breaking down packages of food every Saturday, I wish they sold things in smaller packs too. I feel guilty for not wanting the same meals the following week. It shouldn't be too bad next week as I am off I will have time to shop at smaller stores in town.

Gayle and Judi, you are so funny. Gayle I'm happy to hear your dad is making some progress and hopefully it won't be long before his tube is out.

Manda, hope you and H have a great holiday, when and where are you off to? have sent you a pm but don't know if you have seen it. x

I'm going to be babysitting on Valentines night now, so at least I won't be on my own and I will be with a little man I love :-))))

Have a good day all   xxxxLesleyxxxx

Judi that is hilarious xx I promise I will always fill up Auntie Judi and never text or email or facebook when driving (well not this week anyway) :-)  When do you start your new job?  I hate interviewing and selection.  I have had to do it a couple of times for the playgroup that I help manage (because I am always the idiot that gets landed with everything).  The last time though Wully died two days before the interviews started so at least I had a good excuse not to do it!  Some of the applications can be so funny though. 

Lesley - sounds like a perfect valentines days.  I got my first card yesterday :-)  It was off Ewan though so is just a bit of card absolutely soaked in red paint (which I got all over my hands) and a ribbon kind of flung on top.  Very sweet though.  Think I will clean out my wardrobe and drawers on Sunday and that will keep me out of mischief.

My brain seems to be back where it should be today although I haven't been out yet (school run doesn't count) and have only spoke to one person so we will see how the day progresses.  Think I have PMT or something!

Helen - last day today?  Sooo jealous.

Hope everyone else is well.

Gayle xxx

Hi everyone

Did I mention I `m off for 10 days now yahoo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fiona like already said you have done so well while Darren has been away. Glad he s coming back though x

Lynne hope your day has been calmer today. We ve had mad hair/wig day at school in aid of Haiti so I have looked very elegant in a curly red wig lol!! All good fun!! The deputy and head did assembly in mad black wigs hee hee!! The kids loved it!

I had a `strange` happening on Tuesday night. I was asleep and dreaming but aware that someone was cuddling me while I was asleep. I woke up and lay still for a few mins as I could still feel someone holding me very tightly. I was trying to think am I awake or still dreaming then thought no it must be the dog snuggled into my back. I was almost afraid to move but I looked behind me and no dog!!! The feeling went and I sobbed and sobbed. Was it a dream or was it real? We feel these things and then doubt them but was it Paul? Sounds mad doesnt it? No real answers xxx

Anyway hope everyone is ok, Lesley sorry to hear about the uncertainty but I got made redundant a few years ago and it al turned out for the best, got a job I was much happier in xx

Judi I laughed so much at your story, could just imagine his face lol!!! That s the type of thing that would happen to me, add insult to injury lol

I am chilling tonight and havent got to rush out in the cold tomorrow, bliss!!

Helen xxx

Hi all.  I have just been doing some catching up.  It is so interesting reading lots of posts togther.  Some coincidences as well - I am very impressed with your degree Dot.  I was thinking last week that I should think about doing a degree.  I am the only one among my siblings who doesn't have a degree.  Although I have survived another round of redundancies where I work I may not if it happens again.  A degree may be something I need.  I would just like the challenge.  I am not sure where to start but I am sure I could find out easily enough.

I love the sound of your purple hat lunch Rosemary.  When are you thinking about having it.  I may take you up on your invite and I could help out if you need me.

Lynne I'm glad your Dad's appointment went okay.  I will keep my fingers crossed for him getting the feeding tube out on Friday.

Judi & Gayle you have had me in stitches with your tales.

Patricia that is a good idea to celebrate the Chinese New Year instead of Valentines day.  I still have some sky candles which seem appropriate as well.  Like Lesley, I will be babysitting on Sunday.  Declan will be up here with his Dad for the half term holiday so I have ask if I can collect him on Sunday and keep him overnight.  I can drop him off with his dad on my way to work on Monday.  I think Declan will be the best tonic for me for Valentines day.

Fiona I am sorry Daren wasn't able to find work in Australia but at least he went and had a month doing something he wanted to do.  How was your mothers sister?

I had Stu & Suzanne round for food last night - yes I really did cook a meal for us all!!  It was lovely to cook a proper meal for once.  I made shepherd's pie.  It must be a year since I last made one.  I had enough to freeze some for me for another time as well.  I am going to my Mum & Dad's for dinner tomorrow and then I am going to the local theatre to see a black adder production on Saturday.

I am so jealous of Helen & Sue now that half term is about to start.

Well I have a few things to do so I will check in later to see how everyone is.  Ailsa xx

Evening all , yes its been a bit calmer today , thank goodness , was still an hour late tho , ih well its all extra money for these weekends lol . Helen , wow thats amazing , i've gone all goosbumpy (is that a word ) i'm sure it was Pauls love coming through to you , enjoy your holiday and no i.m not jealous at all (oh yes i am ) Judi your posts always make me laugh , keep them coming lol . Ailsa hope you have a good weekend and well done on the cooking , i will cook on sunday but its ready meals rule for most of the time xx Hope everybody is ok . Sue are you alright , you've been very quiet xxxxxx

Hi everyone, you all seem to be so busy these days. You make me feel ashamed of my laziness. Still not much motivation here to do anything. However, I shall be working for the next three nights. I think my boss is trying to finish me off lol.

Today I went to see 'Les Miserables' in Manchester. I love that show but the song "Bring him home" always reduces me to tears and when it was sung a gain with the words "Take me home" I was in tears yet again. I seemed to be thinking of Ray all the time it was being sung.  I know I am a sad case but there you have it.

Helen, Sue enjoy the half term break.

Lynne take care not to wear yourself out with all these extra hours.

Judi, never mind. We love you and we all know how dense some males can be lol.

Ailsa, Lesley, Manda, Dave, Rosemary and anyone else I have not mentioned, have the best weekend you can.

Love and angel hugs x x x Patricia x x x

Hello again.  Just doing a quick catch up before I slope off to bed.  Helen you must have been posting at the same time as me.  I was amazed at you feeling the cuddle and no-one there.  Like Lynne I feel sure it was Paul's love wrapping you up.

Your day of fundraising sounds like it was fun.  We could do with something like that at our place.  Everyone is a bit down in the dumps because of the redundancies.

I have spent several hours this evening updating the maps on my new sat nav as I get one free update within 60 days of buying it.  It seems to have worked but I will test it out when I have a run down to Becky's on the 19th & Bath on the 26th.

Rosemary I haven't had a chance to do more reading yet but I will do this weekend.

Glad you only did one extra hour today instead of three Lynne.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xxx

Good night Patricia - and everyone else of course xx