My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

Evening all , well just after i got back from a wind swept rainy cemmy the sun came out , but it was still very windy and cold , i didn't spend that long up there today but i know Gordon would not want me sat in the cold . Esme , i bumped into my neice whilst i was out last night and she was dressed similar to  your daughter , but she had a basque and tu tu on and lot a lot else , i nearly had heart failure .My 2 sons we're also out in town and i think if the'yd bumped into me they would have been just the same lol.

Ailsa i hope you got on well with your painting , dont you over do it now , you never seem to stop . The make up is a fantastic idea , sometimes we can get i a rut wearing the same make up /hair style so why not treat your self and if it give you a confidence boost thats good . When is the hen party , are they dressing up or is it a little more refined .

Fiona i hope scooby is a littel better by now , you must be so worried , poor thing . Did you get to clean Kims flat , what a good mum you are , and i'm sure you'll make a fantastic granny /nan . It wont be long now will it ? ..

 Judi the weather did dry up here a little but the wind never dropped , i bet the doggies dont bother about a bit of rain do they ?

Helen did you manage to drag your self down the gym ? I've done dinner for all the kids and after the dishwasher was loaded up i fell asleep on the sofa , even through all the chatter and playing . I wasn't late in about midnightlast night ,  but just not used to it now lol oops showing my age ..

wEll waiting for x factorto come on my fav is Olly , and i think Danyl will go tonight , i dont know why people dont like him i do but he's not my fav .

Lynnexxxxx

Lynne your weather sounds like ours today. Yes we went to the gym, enjoyed it!! Just waiting for X factor too, not sure who will win this year, no favourites yet

Helen xxx

Just wavng a quick "Hi" as X Factor now doing results.  Have at last connected my desktop to the internet in the lounge so much easier to use than the laptop, my fingers don't lock up so much on this keyboard.  Will see if I can get Sam to put some pics of her last night outfit on Facebook for you all to see, she had a great evening and the people she went with were lovely to her (although a little patronising she said, but you can't have everything), so pleased about that.

Can't decide who I want to win XF I love Stacey, Lucie is good though and then of course Olly is brilliant, but Rachel was good too, Danyl is good but not quite everyones cup of tea, Lloyd is a sweetheart but his voice needs to develp further and of course then theres...... nah, they should even be there!

Toodles for now, love to you all (and a hug for Scooby and a supportive purr from Dave cat), hope you are all ok.  xxxxxxx

Hi everyone.  Well I can't get my breath with x-factor - what is going on?

It has been a miserable day here today.  the sun came out once or twice but it has been cold & windy all day and rained a lot of it.  The kids have been round at teatime.  I made a good start on my painting.  There is more to do but a good chance I will finish it this week now.  I am so fed up with the mess!

I suppose the hen night is a bit 'refined' Lynne - it there is such a thing.  We are going to a cuban restaurant and nightclub in London so we have all had to get cocktail dresses.  Shona - my youngest sister who is getting married lives in London.  We are stretching the hen do out into the Sunday as we have planned a surprise for Shona on the Sunday.  We are all booked on the Eurostar to Paris for the day.  We are catching the 7:30am train to Paris for lunch and then champagne and afternoon tea up the eifel tower.  Then we are back on the train and home to London for about 8:30pm.  Like I said - all sounds very refined but I am sure we will lower the tone and show ourselves up when we have had a few!!

I have been having a look at photos on facebook.  There are some good ones - love your costume Lynne.

Well I had best get off for a shower before bed.  Take care everyone.  Ailsa xxx

Hi, everyone

Just popped in to say good night and wish everyone well for the coming week. I've been on half term, but had my mother to stay; ~I took her home to Cornwall on Friday, and came back saturday night. today it's been 12 hours of paperwork for school, so sorry haven't had much time to post.

Love and hugs to all

Sue x

Sun coming out? Rain stopping? - sorry none of that makes any sense here in Aberdeen today.  Lynne, I had to laugh when I saw that you had said 'the dogs probably don't mind a bit of rain'.  A bigger pair of wussies you have never met - not only do they hate rain, I have to completely dry them with a bit towel when we get back (that is even with waterproof coats on!) and they push each other out of the way to get dried! lol.

Watched X factor, and 20 mins of it on exercise bike - then undid any good by having a couple of glasses of wine! Ah well, there is always next week.  Love to all.  Judi xx

sorry, everyone - it sooo annoys me when my pictures do that!!

   this is what should be there!!!!

Hi all, I see that you are having all experiencing a very mixed bag of emotions. I just want to say I hoppe that this coming week starts a little better for you all.I have read your posts from the past few days with great interest. I feel a bit voyueristic at times but continue to read them anyway. It is very strange how we can become so embroiled in other people's lives. If I don't get to read your posts it is like missing my favourite tv programme.  I can't wait for the next installment lol.

Well I have not been online since early Thursday morning. Thursday was a so called 'sleep day' after a night shift. Hmmmm........ not much sleep was had.   Thursday I spent most of the night awake and then got up to go for the train which would carry me to London with three very good friends.  We did have pre-booked seats but as the 2 trains before us had been cancelled it became a free for all in the quest to secure a seat. We stayed in a central London hotel and went to see two (yes two) West End shows. I bought 4 clear 'angel' Christmas tree ornaments in the 'Christmas' shop in Harrod's. I have drunk enough coffee to sink a battle ship and eaten way more than was necessary. We travelled a lot on the underground system and walked up and down many many stairways so hopefully managed to burn off a lot of the excess calories. The train journey was home was 'interesting' to say the least.  There was a very shall we say malodourous woman in the seat behind us.  Hmmm......  I wonder if she would like a gift of toiletries for Christmas??  In the seat to the side of us was a man who was doing the old 'pick it and flick' it routine. A nice big box of 'tissues' for him I think lol. Oh yes, the malodourous woman proceeded to torture her baby by breastfeeding it and thereby subjecting it to a very close dose of body odour. Yuk. poor thing.  When we got off the train and left the staion we waited for a taxi but when I saw a bus I ran for that only tyo find it was going in the wrong direction. Oops. So I then felt silly and proceeded to where my bus should go from. Wow there was one waiting. Phew. So I arrived home safe and well. Sad to be alone but glad to be in my own surroundins.

Have the best day you can tomorrow. Love and angel hugs x x Patricia x x  p.s. I hope you liked this episode of my life lol

Morrning all , well i'm on 10 - 6 this week , dont like it cos you never get finished on time , the only advantage is i get to the cemetery this morning , the gates shut at 4 now so 'm going to struggle all winter now . Sue and Helen hope your ready for your return to work , i never like the first day back but once there its as tho you've neve been off isn't it .xx Ailsa your hen party does sound very refined , Paris , what a fab suprise for your sis i'm sure she'll be thrilled , i cant wait to see pics xx

 Judi the image of the dogs fighting to be dried really made me chuckle , haven't you had floods up there too ? Hope it improves soon , poor doggies you'll have to get them wellies to go with there coats .lolxx

Patricia well why does it not suprise me that you ran for the bus going in the wrong direction , you said you we're bad at directions but that made me chuckle too . Thanks for out chat last night , hope your ok this morning and your instalment of your weekend was great , i too look forward to reading about what everybody is up too . Whem my laptop is playing up it drives me mad , it shorts out then i cant do anything on it . If a ever actually get the insurance money that they owe me , new lappie is first on my list . I probably could take this in for repair but that would mean me being without it perish the thought .xx

Hi to everybody else xx

 Anyway i'll get myself ready , and hopefully talk to you all later ..

Take care Lynnexxx

Evening everyone

Hope you all had a good Monday xxx

Patricia your tales made me laugh and cringe!! That poor baby, eeeww!!

Had an ok day at work, lucky to enjoy my job. Next holiday - Christmas. They`re counting down at work already until we break up - 6 weeks on Friday!!!!!

Daughter has been chatting to her teacher at school today, she is a trained counsellor and has been great with Nat through Paul`s illness and since he died. One of Nat`s friends told her he thought she might be depressed but her teacher has assurred all her feelings are perfectly normal.

Ailsa hope you`ve been ok today - 6 months already (((((())))))

I`ve been thinking back to this time last year! Paul was in Clatterbridge finishing his radiotherapy and having to be tube fed. October was the last time he managed to eat properly. He came home next week then we kidded ourselves until his scans that it might have all worked. Well Paul didn`t really, he always thought it hadn`t worked. I just hoped !!! Ho hum xxx

Hope everyone is ok

Helen xx