My husband died in my arms on the 2nd May (2009) - what happens now?

FormerMember
FormerMember
  • 7970 replies
  • 21 subscribers
  • 1768169 views

My husband - Chris - died on the 2nd May 2009 because he had anal cancer. He knew he was going and we spoke about lots and lots of things before he died. That is why I am just not prepared for the huge amount of guilt I feel now. I feel guilty that the world hasn't stopped turning round even though he has died. I feel like everything should stop as a mark of respect. I also feel very guilty that he had to be so ill he had to die. What a cruel cruel thing it is to make someone so ill their body just stops working. I wasn't ready for him to go. I really really hope these are normal feelings because I must hang on to my sanity for the sake of my 3 children. I have never known sadness like I feel right now. I can't believe that I will not hear his voice or feel his touch again. We were married for almost 32 years and I have known Chris for 34 years - since I was 16. What happens now? Ailsa

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    my dear Dot

    Thank you for your good wishes. i hope that the new year will bring painfree days to Alan, and peace and everything good to you both.

    xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    You're welcome Sue - and thanks for the flowers they are lovely as always..............xxxxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Hello everyone,

    Just a quick one to say that I am still here and keeping up with you all.  Not been very well past couple of days (think I will stick to the pot noodles in future) but feeling a bit better today.  No plans for the rest of the week and definitely early to bed tomorrow or will probably torture myself and sit up for the bells on my own with a little drink and a cry.  Who knows what tomorrow brings in the emotional rollercoaster.  Jamie was crying for his daddy today which was horrible as he hasn't done it for so long.

    Thinking of you all.  Hope you had a good party today Dave.

    Gayle xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    For Gayle  

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Hi,Lynne

    How are you tonight/

    Have been thinking of you today

    Sue xx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Hope you feeling better soon Gayle xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Hi Sue , i'm fine thanks , once again the build up is worse than the day , a few tears this morning but then just got on with it . Was you ok at your funeral , well not your funeral , but you know what i mean xxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    yes, i know what you mean!!!

    yes, I was Ok thanks -  the church was full, and there were about 12 of us from our ladies' group there together- a huge support group, we do the pub quizzes together and go for lunch etc (except that i'm usually at work!!)

    Rowena wrote her own service for her funeral, chose the hymns, prayers, readings, song, etc - what a brave lady.  ironicaly she was given the all clear from breast cancer at the end of November, and by the end of the first week in december it had returned in her bones and she died a week before christmas. Bugger, eh?

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Thats so sad Sue , its so unprecictable , this disease , how brave for her to have done all that . I'll say good night my friend , thank you for your kind words on face book , my boss is amazed with you all . I'll hope to speak to you tommorow night xx Take care Lynne xxxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember in reply to FormerMember

    Good night, Lynne and all my friends here

    Sue xx