Antidepressants

It will be good for you to have your two little grand-daughters more often Patty. As you say it will give you a purpose and that you will gain a closer relationship with them .And children bring us some joy.   The anticipation of the Anniversaries and other significant days can be overwhelming as I don't need to tell you as you are on your 3rd year. I doubt it gets any easier . I find it difficult to think more than a year has passed for me . And I often wish I could go back in time and change the outcome. I am forever getting told I couldn't have changed everything. But knowing what I know now , there were some things I could have changed . You are obviously a strong Lady. But then we have no choice but to Swim through it all or drown in the stormy sea we feel like we are  struggling through. I never imagined there would be so many other emotions to cope with and try overcome. These significant days do bring on depression . Some days I think are going to be better , but without fail I fall apart for a while . I could do with a padded room where I can scream and maybe even smash something to get the anger, resentment and despair out of my system. And let it all out crying.  . I'm sure I'm not the only one who has similar /same feelings . Cx 

I get that Polly. Some days for me still is a lot of `sitting` other than `doing`. You're not alone there

xx

Thanks Breton.

Yes i'm managing to `swim` through everything but some days those big waves of grief come and wash me back to shore where I need to start again but you just keep going it's all you can do I suppose. 

Vicky x

Hi PattyK I hope it's ok to ask but I was on 40mg Fluoxetine prior to my husband being diagnosed 2 months ago and am wondering about asking to increase? Reason being I am a wreck and I feel i'm spoiling our last weeks together by being such a mess emotionally. I'm guessing you were not put on 60 straight away and just wondered if you were increased from 40 as well and if you felt it made a difference. This is the worst thing I've ever experienced in my lift. Thanks 

Hi KKitty.

I have a history of depression because of a genetic disorder I have where anxiety and depression are a symptom. When Jay got the word that his cancer had become terminal after returning after his remission I went to a `very dark place` and like yourself my head was just all over the place got to the stage at one point I didn't want to be here if he wasn't going to be. Just `thinking about it` though was as far as it got thankfully.  I had the sense though to reach out to my GP and he arranged to have the dosage increased I think there is a limit with Fluoxetine as to how much you can take in one day before it causes any adverse effects. I started out on 40mg too and I am now on 60mg (3 tablets) and I take all 3 together once a day. The increase has helped and I have had no adverse side effects just make me feel a little bit drowsy sometimes but I think that is one of the side effects as they are a form of Prozac I believe that help to relax you and calm you down. If I forget to take them some days I do feel it so its just a case of trying to be disciplined and remember to take them. Hope that helps. Take Care.

Vicky

Hi PattyK

Yes that does help, I have had the most awful day with getting upset every time i see my husband cringe in discomfort, I think I will speak to the Dr. Thank you and take care. 

You're welcome Kitty. You take care too.

xx

Hi Patty K, the limit for Fluoxetine is 60mg daily. I used to take Sertraline 50mg and tried an increase to 100mg a day but got awful side effects of clenching my jaw and grinding my teeth. It took ages for these to subside when the dose was reduced back and then tablets were changed. I now take Vortioxetine 10mg daily which has been a great help with both anxiety and depression.

We just need to continue to try and be kind to ourselves. We are grieving and there is no specific timescale for this. Xx

Thanks for that Alyg. I think at one time I actually took two doses in the one day as I couldn't remember if I had taken them that day but then remember I had. This was when I was on the 40mg dosage though. I panicked and phoned NHS24  and was told I would be ok and although it was 80mg in total I had taken I think they said that was still within the limit for daily intake but if I remember I didn't have any adverse effects. I think I was prescribe Valium as well when Jay was going through his treatment when I was feeling particularly bad but was only given them for a short term. 

Vicky