My Loren

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Hello,

I lost my to be wife after a 6 year battle just weeks after we first met she had throat cancer and soon after had to have a tracheotomy fitted. We got the all clear and planned our lives with our children to get married unfortunately we put this on hold for chemo which was meant to be September last year unfortunately the cancer spread and with all the help in the world of the Christy hospital she passed away in March.

i was trying so hard to cope and get up everyday managed to get through Christmas Day because of the kids strength, but new year kicked the wind out of me and has effected me massively.

i did everything possible to look after her right until the very end when it was just me and her but I feel selfish that I’m struggling with it all specially for the children.

Chris x

wesurvived 20 days ago

Of course you're struggling: so are the rest of us in the same situation. Christmas seems to be a particular pressure point, especially if you have children. Be kind to yourself. Those of us here know what you are going through.

Malengwa 19 days ago

Hi. Im sorry you find yourself here, the place noone wants to be part of.

Chrustmas was my first without my husband who died in October. I also found new year much harder, possibly being on my own feeling poorly didnt help. But the thought of going into a new year without him has had me sobbing many times.

I wonder how old your children are? If they are old enough to understand, I think its ok to be honest with them, tell them how much you miss " mummy", keep talking about her even if it makes you cry. They will also be griving in their own way, but if very young, wont understand what it is and may not be able to articulate.

If the children are school age, there should be support available through school, might be worth asking.

Similarly have you accessed any support for yourself?

Keep talking here, we all get it.

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My Loren