So how is everyone doing ?

Hi, sorry for your loss. I am sorry to say we all know what you are going through. 33 years of marriage, which I would not swap anything for. It is very hard and at the moment I can't honestly say it get any easier.  I am currently in counselling which helps for me. A safe space where I talk about Sue and feelings of guilt and just been able to talk about everything helps. I even smile when a good memory pops up. All being well I am going to try a bereavement coffee morning.  I don't know if I am ready for that yet ,but I am going to try. I wish I could say the right thing to you. Just try and look after yourself.

Thank you for your kind words I just hope that time will help

I wish you all the best on this horrible journey.  Please remember to look after yourself.  We know it's hard but as they say one step.

It’s also week six for me and I totally agree it feels as though it’s getting harder.  I break down in tears more now but I wonder if it’s just a delayed reaction as in the first few weeks there was plenty of admin to occupy by days.  I went to my first counselling session on Monday that was emotionally exhausting but I hope it will help me in some way.  I’m due back to work soon and I am dreading it but also know I need to get out of these four walls.  People have been kind but they don’t really know the way we feel and j would not wish it on them it’s so overwhelming and you will never feel the same or be the same person you were before your loved one passed away.  Like I say to people I too died that day.  Please use this forum to vent it is good to know we are not alone in how we are feeling.  Take care 

Please let me know what you think of the “coffee morning”. They mentioned it to me but I just can’t face the thought of it at the moment.  Like you I went to my first 1-2-1 counselling session on Monday, boy that was an emotional rollercoaster but I think I came way positive.  It’s the gut wrenching crying that is causing me issues now.  I was hoping that had passed but it will all of a sudden start and comes out of nowhere. Of course I know my husband has passed away but it’s like all of sudden I realise this is it my life now completely on my own.  No future nothing but this emptiness and loneliness.  The house is so quiet I hate it.  People say how are you today feeling any better?  I want to scream No my husband is still dead so what do you think?  But of course I don’t.  Look after yourself and remember you are not alone on here for a vent., I find it a comfort 

Hi, the bereavement coffee morning, was to be honest not sure. I am going again in a couple of weeks as it makes me get out. I prefer the counselling but she has been on holiday the last two weeks.  The coffee was everyone knew each other apart from me and were talking about stuff I did not know. Nobody talked about there partners which I thought was strange. Maybe I need to say why I am there, I don't know. I just wanted to cry nowt strange there. First time I had been with people other then Dr or counselling since Sue's funeral. 

Ps week six I started to feel like I was going backwards. Now week 11 tomorrow and it's still horrible. 

I’m sitting in the doctors waiting room my face to face as all previous appointments had been on the phone but he suggested coming in to get me out.  I get panicked and I just want to go back to the house but then when I get there it’s so lonely.  The coffee morning isn’t for me then I want people to be sad if I’m sad not happy and chatty maybe this will change but at this present moment I can’t see it.  We make small steps keep strong

It's good you have got out. The last two times I have been to the Dr face to face which I think did me good. The next time is the phone again. I don't know which is worse at the moment making yourself go out or coming home to a empty house. I say hello to Sue's ashes when I come home( not managed to scatter them yet).