Valentines day

Valentines Day is also my beautiful Valen’s birthday. 

It hit me earlier today that he will be forever 56. 
That in May, my birthday, I will be older than him for the first time.

i never got him a Valentines card, always only a birthday card. 
We didn’t go out for a Valentine’s meal, it was a birthday meal.

It’s so hard today. 
Overwhelming sadness, emptiness. 
You all know the jumble of emotions, I don’t need to say them.

But it’s now 2.10am on the 15th.

We got through it. 
For another day.

Sending you all warm wishes xx

Hi there, it is incredibly hard. We didn’t celebrate Valentine’s Day either. In fact, we just laughed at the prices of flowers, and got them a few days later. The romance and adverts just reinforce our loss, and makes everything more difficult. I went to my darling Paul’s grave yesterday to have a talk to him. There were snowdrops, daffodils and the rose bushes are starting to grow. The sun came out, It was so beautiful there, and it gives me great comfort to be near him. I will be doing my spring arrangement soon. I am still trying to find a way through. Sending strength and hugs. Kate.xxx

Valentine's Day is our anniversary and this year was 38 years.  It's been really hard this year. 

Used to have a laugh on Valentines Day but that's all gone now. Jay's birthday was the 12th February 2 days before. Would get him loads and he would say don't get me anything for Valentines so I would get him a small card and then he would turn up with the big boxed card effort, flowers, chocolates etc and then say to me `where's mine`? to which I would fall about laughing because he knew I would see the funny side. then he had this thing that he would sit both cards together side by side and say something like `lovely big card that who sent it to you and then he would say oh that's right it was me` and then say `we can see who got the cheapskate valentines card` and this would make me double up in two laughing as it was an ongoing thing. This year on Valentines just the day after our son got married. It was a lovely day and everyone enjoyed themselves I did too but just still had that terrible `empty feeling`. My son and his now wife made a rememberance table where they put photos of loved ones they had lost including Jay and my daughter-in-law's mother who just passed last year. I gave a speech which Jay would have done and it went really well so was pleased at that and felt good after it happened but for all of a good day it was I just felt something was still missing and that something I think was Jay. I guess this will always happen at things like this. Take Care everyone. 

Vicky xx

Hello there my wee Scottish person, Just reading some of the posts and thought of you and how it had gone at your son's wedding. Well done. You managed it. With thoughts of course of the loved ones that should have been there. It sounds as if they were there really in heart and mind. 

Lots of hugs

Fiona xxx