Loss of my wife

I'm so sorry for your loss and that your wedding ring is damaged. 

I'm coming to my 6th anniversary and I don't think I will ever take it off. At some point I will have my husbands wedding ring changed into 2 rings one each for our sons. 

Could you try another jewellers and see if it can be mended?

Take care 

Hello Andrew b 

A very good question and as  Ruby diamond says, probably never. I am sorry for your loss and for the ring too. I won't take mine off. It is a bit tight but I look at it every day and it gives me a sort of comfort. It is also nearly two years ago for me too since Barry's death.

These things take time and everyone is different. You just do as and when you want. 

Take care 

I have my husbands wedding ring on a chain and wear it around my neck too big for any of my fingers. I haven't worn my wedding ring for years but that is just because my fingers became swollen at one time as I gained weight and the ring was actually squeezing my finger so I have it in a trinket box and I know it's there but that's not to say I didn't think any less of my husband just that I couldn't get it on my fingers and just that I never wore it again.

Would have been his 70th birthday today. I really thought he would have lived to see it here with us but not to be and cancer had other plans for him so that's a milestone I've missed and there will be more he will miss here I'm sure. Just hope he's had a lovely 70th birthday wherever he is. Take Care

Vicky x

Hello there 

Just wondering how it went yesterday?  It would have been your husband's 70th birthday. Not easy is it ? Basically we never stop thinking about them do we ? It is with us all the time deep down within us. Nobody knows from the outside the inner pain we feel sometimes. I just hope you had some family support yesterday. I know from your recent posts that you have some issues with that too but today is a new day. What would he have wanted for you ? Not to be sad.

There is hope. Hold on.

Take care 

Hi Fifi!

Yes got through yesterday ok. Just nice to sit and reflect on his past birthdays. He wasn't one for fuss and was happy to just let his birthdays come and go but would celebrate them in his own quiet way. Just the two of us going out to dinner was enough for him but I always surprised him with unexpected presents. He would mention something he would like to get and it would stick in my brain and that would be what to get him for his birthday/Christmas whatever came first it would probably be a book, picture or some gadget that would end up getting thrown in a drawer once the novelty had worn off but he was always so delighted when you presented him with said item. Just need to get Valentines day over tomorrow another first without him in 40 years. 

x

Hello again 

Glad for you that it wasn't too bad yesterday. Valentine's Day today without our loved ones ? Not too good myself with all these things. Thought I would write my Barry a Valentine letter. I have been writing a journal since last year . It contains memories of how we met, how we came to France, and quite a bit about stories he told me. He was a photographer/ journalist amongst other things ! He travelled around most of the world and when we first met he had just come back from Africa with the Band Aid project and Bob Geldof.

I am going to write a last letter to him and hopefully it will be helpful. 

Have as good a day as possible. Ps they are always with us.

Thanks Fifi

Have acknowledged Valentines on Facebook being my first without him in 40 years. Just remembering the silly things we would do because his birthday was two days apart we never really went in for Valentines and just celebrated both on his birthday but always got one another cards. I would get him a nice standard size one usually funny or humourous and then he would turn up with the oversized boxed effort and the standing joke between us was who got the `cheapskate` Valentines card then send me into fits laughing because he used to sit them both side by side to compare size and come out with something like `Lovely big card that, who sent you it?` then look at mine and say something like `Is that it`? but it was all in good fun. That's how we rolled. It wasn't all hearts and flowers and many banter and trading insults- but in a fun way and will miss that and I do. I know he is with me somewhere around though I like to think that he is here with me guiding me along the way. 

xx

Hi, Andrew, 

I,m sorry for your loss and that your ring has been damaged. 

I retired a couple of years early, 15 months after my husband died.  We’d always planned a special trip to the US when we retired but he didn’t make it so I took myself off on the trip by myself.  It was a huge adventure in many ways and taught me a lot about myself. I decided before I went that I would leave my rings at home and not wear them again.  I knew I had to build another life for myself - I watched my mum live another 22 years after my dad died young and never made that life for herself.  Leaving the rings at home felt like the first steps of getting out there and finding that new life, that new normal we all have to strive for.  My dear husband has been gone nearly 18 years now and I’ve never regretted  going on my new path.  I like to think of him egging me on to as much mischief as possible…..

All good wishes to you. 
Sandy. 

Hi Andrew, I'm now at the 2-and-a-half-year stage from when Sue passed away from cancer - just 61years old - what a waste. I still wear my ring and have no intention of removing it.

Sue was my rock, my advisor, my filter, my everything. Whenever I need her advice I twirl the ring and draw strength from it. Some may think that's absolutely crazy, but it works for me. 

Do I send this message? Well, I'm twirling my ring and the answer is 'yes'. 

Thanks  I'm guna keep it on but I do need to try and get it fixed my step daughter try hatton garden jewellers I know it will be expensive from there , it's still very raw Jean was 60 when she passe away from cancer ️