Hello

Hello i am so sorry you have had to come here, and it is such early days for you.

You will gets lots of support here, in every aspect.

I am coming up to 3years this October and never thought i would get this far, but help and support here carried me threw.

As you can see i still use the group ,because  at times, i still need support and i get it, and will always help others when they are just starting this journey, as some one was there for me, when needed..

Others will come along, and please ask ask anything, your emotions will kick in, mine did, was sad, angry,happy in a funny way, hits when you least at expect it, it is normal, at ties i thought i was going crazy i was not.

I did not want you to think no one was about, there is always some one here.

Ellie x

I am so sorry for your loss. I also lost my husband on Saturday at 07:39am. He had only been in hospital 6 weeks and also had some time in ICU too. He was only 52. Also having all the funeral bits etc to deal with but I just don’t know what to do. The house is silent without him, the bed empty, no soul mate to talk to 

MikeCharlie and Coco65,

As ellie 73 has said, this is the place to find support and understanding. And by that, I mean true understanding. Unfortunately, we have to had experienced this to properly know how it feels.

The weeks and months will be a rollercoaster: friends and family will be supportive, but some will surprise you - both positively and, well, not so. It will be strange to comprehend the latter, it just happens. There is no malice intended from anyone; they just don't truly understand what you/we are going through. There will be silly comments from people for example. It's partly because they don't really know what to say or do!

The cliche of trying to stay strong is true, but don't hesitate to let the tears flow either.

Take care,

WDJ

Hi Ellie, and thank you.  Sorry, I can't come up with anything else to say right now, but it's good to know one's not alone.

Hi Coco, It's still very raw for you too, then.  52 is way too young; at least my wife had lived her "three score years and ten", not that that's "old" these days.  I know what you mean about the silent, empty aspects.  I find myself still telling her things, saying stuff like "It's going to be a colourful autumn this year", the sort of thing one does say. 

Hi WDJ, and thanks.  Everyone's very kind and supportive atm, apart from the old buddy I bumped into recently - he's a nice guy, but only works on transmit, so I never said about my wife as I couldn't get a word in edgeways.  It upset me a bit at the time, but in the end it's of no real consequence.

Hello to any and all, this is my first post, my wife passed away nearly 2 weeks ago, I find myself(for some reason) ! Looking for kindred spirits, the expression a trouble shared is a trouble halved is often used, in my case I find myself suffering with the greatest trouble I have ever experienced and the one person who I would always confide in is no longer by my side.    After 43 years of companionship I feel so lost and would appreciate any thoughts, experiences  or advice.

Thanks in hopeful anticipation.

Hi Limo1

So sorry you have had to join this group, it is so early for you and still raw and will be for quiet a while, i am sorry to say,

You will get a lot of support here as, only some one that has gone, or going threw it truly understand, even my children  did not understand.

Yes it was their Dad, different from husband and wife, or partners, They all have their own lives to get on with, and i would not want it any other way., their grief is different to mine..

He was the other half of me, at the start i was lost, cut in half,i did not know who i was, who is ellie with out him.

Never been on my own we met when i was sixteen, so yes he was my life.So yes people do here understand, then the emotions, kick in come from know where, well did for me, it is part of the grieving process,

I was angry at him for going, i was sad, at times i was happy in a funny sort of way,i was hurtful towards him.

I loved him to bits so i then felt guilty.

Though as you go along, others will say yes, i have been there, its not a nice road we have been put on, though it is one, we have to travel to get to the other end, if we ever do.

It is nearly three years this October for me, though i still have to use this group,

I am only just starting to find out who ellie is on her own, i do not like it, but i have no choice.

Please fill free to ask anything here, and some one will always answer, use the group i would not have got this far without it.

,

Ellie. Thankyou for your honest response, i dont think you told me anything i didnt know, but seeing it in black and white from someone i have never met, sort of makes it more real if that makes any sense. I have to carry on for my kids and i am so glad i have got them. We are approaching winter and i am looking ahead with absolute dread, but i know i just have to get on with it !!!

Reread that, the kids are well into adulthood!!