It’s the first anniversary of my Linda passing on July 17th 2022, for the past few days I’ve hardly stopped crying, it feels like it’s only just happened, this is how I felt then. Even the slightest family difficulty or feeling of being ignored, sends me crashing. Trying to control my breathing, and keep calm.
I was doing so well, or so I thought, actually felt more positive recently, now I feel I’m back to square one.
it can only be the first year anniversary coming up causing this. I have planned to watch some of Linda’s favourite movies in July, my youngest son said he will join me,
Mary Poppins, Mama Mia, My fair Lady, Calamity Jane. May remember sone others later, Feel it will bring me closer to Linda.
Really never saw this coming 
I’ll get through this, I know I will, keep telling myself this is the price I am paying for the tremendous love we shared, so really good value 
couldn’t stop crying, so watched Orville on Netflix, really relaxed me, didn’t go to bed til 4am. Been told not to mourn, but celebrate the time Linda and I had together, easier said that done
Totally easier said than done!
Pete used to love watching, Gold rush, documentaries about the war, fishing, wild life. I cannot watch any of these, makes me so sad it is unbelievable. If l am truly honest it is because there is only one person that, l should be watching this with, Pete and he is not here anymore.
.
Just feel so sad, near to tears all the time. There is no cure, I am living for everyone else, definitely not for me
Linda You are my best memory, You are all of my best memories
I think that’s the one thing I don’t do, I am the same for everyone. No one is in any doubt how I feel, if someone asks , I tell them, probably won’t ask me again though 
Linda You are my best memory, You are all of my best memories
