Went swimming today, 3-4pm & had a subway for Lunch, sat in the car and ate it while it was still hot.
before my Linda passed, such things were never a problem or a challenge, it’s taken me 8-9 months to achieve this, so crazy.
still felt quite anxious, but since getting home, have felt a little better, been putting music, sorted by decades, plus my favourite albums, inc some meditative music, and audio books ( ones I listened to as a kid, jimmy clitheroe, navy lark etc ) give me an alternative to Netflix
take care everyone, starting to believe there is hope for me
Hello, I'm so pleased you went swimming as you've said you have been wanting to for a while. This is a great step to take and hopefully you will go again.
It's not crazy at all. Everything we achieve, however small it might seem and however long it takes to do it, is amazing. If this makes you feel more positive and can go out a bit more then that's great. It's so easy to stay in, but once you get out there hopefully you'll get to feel better about it.
Kind thoughts to you.
Thank you, my motivation was encouraged through this forum and from family, but ultimately, you have to find the inner strength. Did find it a little boring, half the pool is closed for lane swimmers, but there were only about 8 people there, almost more lifeguards than people. Plus diving isn’t allowed anymore, wasn’t up to that today, but used to enjoy that. Plan to go at least once a week, May stuck to Mondays, want to encourage my Youngest son to go with me, he has severe social moiety, but when I tell him how quiet it is, maybe he’ll give it a try, who knows.
Well done, I know that anxious feeling. I have been able to go out food shopping and for walks, and I have been out for one or two meals with family, but sometimes I feel as if I am in zombie mode, like I am in some alternative space to everyone else. It is now 6 months since my Lin died but I still miss her so much. We had plans for doing things to the house after I had retired (last March) but Lin was too ill and couldn't face the upheaval that would have been involved. I decided to carry on with these plans because that was what we had wanted and I know she would like me to continue with them. I did start things off by contacting an architect and getting initial draft plans drawn up but it has stalled a bit recently as I had been feeling a bit down and anxious. Today I took the next step and arranged to get a couple of quotes for cavity wall insulation, which I want to do before the extension and it will help with getting an EPC 1 rating, this being required if I decide to have an air source heat pump installed. So I am pleased with myself for doing this next step today. Moving forward slowly but I wish Lin was here to share the future with me.
Small but positive steps for both of us.
so pleased you’re moving forward with your project. Someone described it like walking on treacle, I can see how that is, because every step taken needs so much effort, my eldest Son is around tomorrow afternoon, I hope he’s bringing some cuttings, which I’m going to ‘ bring on’ in the planters, until they are ready to go in the ground. Even bought a few annuals for the front and back pots, and even remembering to water them, I would be in trouble if I didn’t
Yes, I have also been out in the garden. I find it very therapeutic. I have got some bedding plants to put in from a local garden centre, so will be putting those out in the next few days. Pruned a few small shrubs today that were taking over so that I can plant in front of them. Enjoy tomorrow with your son and fingers crossed he brings those cuttings.
Off to bed now, so goodnight and rest easy if you can.
yes he bought a few, need to get some more from him, unfortunately he is struggling with anxiety and depression also and cancelled a visit to him we had arranged. But I am managing much better, just in the past few days, overcoming my fear of going somewhere social…..swimming…has helped a lot, even feel better driving now, just got to keep the momentum going. Swimming is planned for every Monday, Hopefully can keep myself active, been sorting out my music collection, actually listened to some on my iPod earlier today…..that’s a change in itself, so there is hope for me
So glad you seem to be managing better but a shame your visit to see your son was cancelled and sorry to hear he is struggling. I had depression when I was young and know how overwhelming it can be. Tell him to keep the faith as things will get better. I am still having those anxious feelings on waking without my Lin at my side. I have been keeping busy in the garden, so that is helping my mood. Going to watch my son play cricket today, so looking forward to that.
Have a good weekend.
looks like the weather is better today, should be good for the cricket, definitely interactions of any sort, people or tasks, do help my mood.