Actually it is the ‘nevers’

Oh I know it’s really hard, the feelings of loss are overwhelming and I don’t or can’t think of anything that will make you feel better, because I feel the same but sending you my best hug anyway……. Much love xx

Thank you. I feel guilty putting negative things on here but it helps to write it sometimes and on here it is away from my family. 
Have a good weekend 

Hi Jude

You are so right when you say it’s the ‘Nevers’ that hurt the most because they will be with us for ever. 
It was 33 weeks  ago yesterday that Ian passed away and yet, it still feels like yesterday. I’ve cried so many tears already this morning …..

Take care of yourself,

Julie x

Never feel guilty…you’re enduring enough and by you sharing, opens the door for others to share. Be kind yourself xx

Oh Julie, I’m sorry your feeling rubbish, I was like that at 4am, but I’m ok now.  I’m just going out the door, using my legs, apparently walking will make me feel better, or so I’ve read.

 I’m on my own tonight, so I could give you a call if you’re in? 

I’ll be in touch later xx

Hello Jude2,

How very true this is. For me it’s almost 16 months since I lost Chris after 44 years of marriage, 46 of being a couple. Somehow, I got through all the firsts- mostly thanks to our sons and some close friends. But since the new year I have found things still tip me over the edge. And I know I’ve been thinking about that endless list of ‘never agains’ Yet again, knowing someone else is, sadly, feeling the same reassures me that I’m not going mad, that it’s all part of this most awful loss that we’re going through. So thank you for sharing.
Take care, sending hugs

Jane

xx

Hi Jude2

I think that also adding about negative feelings are important, because if we are all honest we all have them. I have them as l cannot feel that l will ever move on from the way, l am feeling after loosing Pete in October 2021.

Please don't feel guilty as it is part of ( HUGE part) what we are all going through. At times l want to write negative things, and then l think people will get fed up with me, but if  it is how you are feeling it cannot be helped. 

At least there is always someone here to be our sounding boards. xx

Take care x

I'm so with you there, thats all I can think about is the 'nevers' they are the biggest things I think, I only lost my husband in Dec, I know its early days but in so many ways its feels so long ago and in others it feels like yesterday, my time frames are all over the place.  We will all come out the otherside (whatever and where ever that is) but we will carry on....  Big hugs x

Just when you feel terrible in your own pit of despair, someone comes along to remind you that your not the only one suffering the loss.  Valentines day tomorrow, and Gill always made a huge fuss about it, Our youngest  son's just been on the phone in tears, he's 37 and lives on his own, but every year he got a valentines card from his Mum -

I told him that there's no chance he was getting one from me, as I can't manage Gills poetry.  Apparently the poetry was occasionally corny but always welcome.  We ended up reliving valentines days past, and both less tearful than before the phone call. 

We always made Valentines special in some way and here in Norfolk we also ensured Jack Valentine came to visit the children when they were young. So this year I was dreading ‘the nothingness’. I was wrong. I went out early to babysit for 2 hours and came home to find Jack Valentine had been aka my son. Chocolates, a rose, books and a poem. So thoughtful…. but reduced me to tears. I know I am lucky