Technology virgin

Hi there,

I am so sorry for your loss. And I am glad you have found this site where you will find a lot of support.

I know the feeling of whishing that we had had time to be shown how to do the things our spouses used to do. It sounds like your son is a good support to you but I think you are also right in saying that perhaps some courses might help and I think it is really good that you want to learn the things your husband used to do. Keep us posted how it goes.

Love, Mel

Alice

I am sorry you have had to join this group but you will get a great deal of help here as i did,

I know how you fil, well you have done a lovely thread, so you have found your way round this bit of the new world.

I was like you, Ton did every thing, think it is the older generation, we where married 53 years, and did all the man jobs, as well as sprting out bills, banking and so on. I did not know how to work the remote control for the television.

It is just two years since he passed, and over time i am starting to surprise myself, have worked out the bill part, even doing household insurance,

Learnt how to do the garden, and paint his fence, its not easy as he had his jobs and i had mine.

Now its a one man band household, i do not like it, but it can be done,

One of his   jobs was wrapping the Christmas presents i hated doing that. I have finished the now and got very upset  while doing it and getting angry because he should be here doing it, such a simple thing reduced me to tears.

Give yourself time,learn one thing a day that's how i coped, this week central heating broke for three days but now sorted,

Your not alone and plenty of people here have been threw this same journey we are on.Take Care Ellie xx

Thank you for your kind words.My first time of realising a job that Gareth always did was arranging flowers in vases.I had lots of lovely flowers given to me when he passed away and I could hear him telling me what a pigs ear I had made of arranging them.He did love his flowers.

Hi Alice,

I am so sorry about your loss.  As others have mentioned, you'll find some lovely people on here who can understand, and relate to what you're going through.  

You've managed to find your way here and post a message so well done you for making a good start.  I just wanted to say that if you need any help with technology you're welcome to send me a message if you have questions or need something explaining.  I've sent you a friend request so you can contact me directly if you need - I'm not an expert but fairly technical so will help wherever I can. 

Sending you lots of support 

x

Hi Alice45,

Even though I’m not too old technology is not my forte either, no idea how to use the DVD player via the TV, taken me until 3 weeks ago how to alter the times for the central heating which is done via an app, I have yet to work out how to connect it up to my phone tho so still using via the app on Craig’s. I had little interest in this stuff so never took much notice oh how I wish I had listened!!
I was social secretary & financial controller in our house so the banking not a problem although in some cases you still physically have to go into the bank to sort them out. Let me know if you find a course think I might be joining you & enrolling!

Tracey xx

One of the things I don’t understand is there are four remotes for the TV and it is like spaghetti junction behind it with all the different cables. I am in the process of deciding if I am likely to want Sky,Netflix etc.Also a Bose soundbox,DVD player.amp whatever that is.I just want a TV and one remote.

Hello all

I lost Chris in October 2020 after 46 years of being a couple, 44 years of being married (and they said it wouldn’t last). We shared roles around the house, although not in the traditional ways. He stayed at home with our boys which back in 1981 was quite rare. 

I am quite happy with technology whereas he only got a mobile phone 5 weeks before he died, when he went into hospital for his thyroidectomy. But the car has been a different matter. I’d never filled the car with petrol, even when I had my own car. Shocking but true. This week, I had to refill the windscreen washer. I’d not even opened the bonnet but with the help of the trusty handbook, I managed it! But I did look round waiting for a round of applause which didn’t come but I was, and am quite proud. Again, ridiculous but true!! 

Ellie, the garden and fence painting have been two biggies for me too. I must confess to breathing a sigh of relief when the weather changed and it meant I could ignore the garden for a month or two! Then I apologised to Chris! 

I’m sure we will all come across jobs, big and small, that we have no idea what to do but I’m also sure that we can get there somehow. It’s not fun but we can do it, because we’ll do it for those we’ve lost and miss so very much.

Sending love and wishing you strength

Jane

xx

i’m with you on the remotes, I had no idea how to get to Netflix, friends showed me and I promptly forgot (bereavement brain as I call it). My daughter was here yesterday and showed me again!

My problem was the heating and setting the timer.  I asked the landlord who said he had no idea so I tried but didn’t understand the instructions so just switched it on and off as needed.  A friend came on Friday and he did it for me .

Just been sitting here thinking I must do Robs tax for 20/21.  Plus i’ll have to do for 21/22 as well next year.  i’ve always done his tax as it’s not too complicated but have always had to double check with him to make sure I haven’t forgotten anything.  Guess i’ll just do the basics this year and HMRC will have accept.

Take care 

Hello

i struggle with different things, domestic things I can’t ask Linda about now. So I totally understand what you mean. 
if there’s any Technical advice / guidance you need, just ask, at least I am more than competent in that area. Once friends you can PM me, can PM you my email if it’s easier.

keep safe and well