Six months on …..

Dear Trixieone

Your words have struck me deeply tonight for as Christmas approaches and I sit here missing my Gordon ten months after his death. Unlike you I hardly venture over the step preferring to stay at home where I feel safe and not alone. I still have my little dog who is now almost seventeen years old and very frail but we venture to the fields twice a day. We ever were never  blessed with a family so I am alone, I am still a wife but I also feel I’m just a shell of a person. I simply miss him so very much and yet I have had a few odd days when I have been able to go out in the car and have a drive round, I have even laughed sometimes - usually at the dog! 
My dear Trixieone we have to keep going as your Ian and my Gordon would be distressed to know how sad we are. Let’s keep going my dear, let’s honour our wonderful memories and the love we share.

June

You are not alone with this situation.

I am two years down the road, do not cry as much, i have children and grandchildren, but i am alone in many ways.

Never done anything on my own before, Tom and i where together for 53 years a life time the only life i have ever had.

I do not know who i am with out him, lost cut in half.

I go through each day, really not living  just existing . Its hard one day at a time,

As you said Will6 they would want us to. i have wonderful memories but some times its not enough, he used to make me laugh everyday, i so miss that.

Its the simple things i miss the most, the saying is true You do not know what you have till its gone, then its to late.

I talk to him more now, than when he was here, most doubt have gave him a headache lately, and can him saying for goodness sake give it a rest and i smile.

Take Care Ellie xx

Dear Trixieone,

im just approaching the 8 week mark since Craig passed away also taken very suddenly diagnosed 10/9/21 passed away 16/10/21. I’ve had days again this week we’re the tears have flowed frequently I don’t feel there is anything wrong with this but agree I don’t feel I have much of a purpose in the home no real desire to cook a meal for just myself but equally trying to get on with things as I know Craig would want me to but miss him so very much.

Keep plodding on, one day at a time

Hugs

LT xx

Dear June

Like you, I have days when I smile and laugh but there is no real depth to my feelings. Even after six  months, I can’t come to terms with losing Ian so suddenly. We never discussed the future as we both thought we had more time together, little did we know.

Ian would be distressed, and probably a little surprised, at my sadness but I just can’t seem to feel real joy in anything I do. As to the future, I can only see loneliness and no direction.

Take care,

x Julie 

I feel the same , I lost my husband ian one year ago , I feel  worse Now  than I did a year ago, I just can’t see a future , I miss him so much and I am scared of the years ahead without him x

8 weeks since Sharon, my reason for living, passed away, and whilst I feel exactly the same way, it also makes me consider is this type of future really worth it ! I have a brother who is my absolute rock, and also 2 kids & 2 grandkids but do they really need me, because all together they are unable to fill the emptiness I now feel overwhelmed by.

A broken heart is so painful and destructive.

Bless you all.

Paul

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1. Paul, you all need each other and lean on each other.  It’s still early days for you (that old cliche but true), and you are still trying g to make sense of it all. 

Have you thought about some counselling to talk through your thoughts.  I have counselling through the hospice that supported me and had been a great help in the jumble of thoughts in my mind.

One thing she says to me after every session is Be Kind to yourself.

Take care

Hi Chelseablue (from a Wigan blue !).

I have actually been seeing a psychologist since before Sharon's passing, yes it does help. However it's like my thoughts overwhelm anything I've been advised. Whilst I see my kids we are not close enough for such intimate discussion. My main outlet are my brother and best friend.

Be kind to yourself I have heard many times, but has always been something I find very difficult, and my shrink is trying to address that. It's almost like I must suffer the agony to somehow compensate for what my darling Sharon went through. It's crazy I know but I'm sure most on here can understand.

Take CarePaul

This is exactly how I feel !