Diagnosis v cause of death

Hello Paul,

I am sorry to read about the loss of your wife Sharon and can feel and share your pain.

Looking at various other sites it would appear that this type of cancer is known by three names as it affects the various parts of the body 

that are linked by the bile duct, I found one site that said it is rare and difficult to treat, it did go on to say that the survival rate is not good.

I understand you being worried and confused about what is written on the death certificate, but you must take a little time out and take

stock.

Have you had anything else to do with the hospice since Sharon passed?, the reason I ask is they are there for you and I am sure they

will help you to try and find answers.

I would ask myself what benefit would a medical team gain from keeping the truth from you, I would wonder if they tried to protect you 

from the fact that time was short, or was it mentioned and with such a huge blow to the system did you miss what was said or the long 

words that would be used.

I worry that  if you devote too much time to this you will loose the good times you had

I hope this helps.

John                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                           

Hi Paul I am a registered nurse. The bike duct and gall bladder are connected. I would guess Sharon had her cancer in both areas as well as her lung being secondaries.

My husband died quickly of lung cancer, diagnosed mid October and passing suddenly on 28/12/2019. I had loads of questions both through treatment and afterwards. None were answered. I was going to take it further, his care was awful but as it was pointed out to me, it was only me who was suffering by these questions. The hospital never cared or would they change practice sadly and it wouldn't change anything for him or bring him back. 

Try not to torture yourself, we too were not told it would be so quick and thought there was time to arrange things and do a bucket list. Sadly not. Two years on, I have moved forward, I have a new man in my life who cares for me and my memories. But I no longer have regrets or guilty feelings. I know I did my best as I am 100% sure you did too and I know it is still raw now but move forward with tiny steps and you will get there.

Try and do something small at Christmas to remember Sharon and something a bit bigger for you.

Take care 

Love and Hugs Alison xxx