I have noticed in recent years an increasing use of platitudes. But as a fairly recent widow I am getting fairly nauseous with some of them in the past weeks.
These include a “take great care” . From someone who, a few weeks ago, took air over a ramp with me in the back seat of her car. Now I have a back injury which she has re-injured. I now have pain all around my abdomen and buttocks, and numb patches all down my legs. I am not best pleased as I already use a wheelchair for distance 
.
And “keep on smiling” from my sister in law. A woman who when widowed herself would have wanted to hit someone if they had said that to her.
Am I being over sensitive? 
Best not answer that . People can be crass.
Viv
Hi Pooka,
I am sending hugs to you! Grieving is individual and you are right to do it whatever way you need.
People mean well but they struggle to find the right words or to know what to say. And there are other people that verge on being callous. We were both injured in the plane crash at Kegworth and recently I listened to someone wittering on about what great insight my husband had about my injuries and my sport. I was doubly insulted. I more than anyone know how the pair of us adapted. It was nobody else’s business . And that applies to grieving - it is nobody else’s business.
i still text my husband. I tell him all sorts of things and how I feel. I am sure many people would think me barmy but I don’t care.
Viv
xx
