can anyone suggest reading material to help me in my grief?

Dear Limbo and Jonta,

Yes, this site keeps me sane also. I get such comfort and support from reading of others who are also going through what I am going through. It really does help and support me. I'd also love a group, best on zoom, with coronavirus, and then it does not matter where you live, but I don't know of any. So I use books as  an extra aid, an extra help.

Hi Happy5 and all on this thread.

This forum also keeps me sane too.

Where I’d be watching TV until late before coming to bed before my wife passed away, I now come to bed and read through lots of the comments made by some lovely souls on this site, who understand exactly how I feel, which I take great comfort from.

I’m not reading much nowadays, nor am I really interested in watching much TV. I’ve watched two films since my wife’s passing and I cried at both films so I try to avoid the sad ones, as we used to watch the ‘Rom Coms’ together and we’d look at each other during the sad bits and reach for the box of Kleenex in tandem . 

I think I could also see merit in a group on zoom, but we’ll see what others think of the idea?

I do hope we all find peace one day, Ian x

Hi Happy5 thank you for your reply it helps just knowing somebody else is going through the same pain.  I have seen your reading list which I’m sure will be useful at some point . I’m sending lots of love to you and everyone else suffering from this very real painful time. 

Hello all

Yes, I’d be lost without this forum. The thoughts that others share provide so much comfort and reassurance.

I do watch television and I have been reading too- could I tell you what I’ve watched or read? Apart from Line of Duty, probably not! But I find it passes time. 

I’d be prepared to give a group Zoom a go if enough folk are interested. 
Hugs 

Jane

xx

Hello from the states! Frankly, I stopped watching the telly, reading the news and almost all other media sources. I am much more at peace now, as the human mind and spirit is not intended to absorb dreadful news 24/7. If it was not for the few hours of so-so sleep we get, there would literally be nothing but bad news. I decided to take control of that which my eyes see and my ears hear. The big things I will hear of sooner or later in any case. I read. contemplate. Meditate. It can be utterly amazing how peaceful life is when mind and body are both relaxed. Then someone rings and...  

Hi everyone,

I am writing this post with mixed feelings.

I, too, love and need this forum, even though I am no longer as active as I used to be in the early days of my bereavement. I guess life does move forward and takes itself with me and I am often so busy that I can't come online for a number of days.

I am so glad some of you have expressed to have a Zoom meeting. I, too, would love that so much.

I don't know how we could do this though. I have so often in the past tried to send some information on here - for example information on my book - and it was deleted and the moderators were telling me that I couldn't post anything of a personal nature here. Another time I posted about the group for bereaved spouses I run on MeetUp - again, the post was deleted. So it seems that there are some people in the organisation of MacMillan who not only read all our posts but also decide what can and what cannot be posted. I have always found that upsetting. Firstly, I feel that it is my right to share with people whatever I want, and, secondly, what sort of a support network is this if we are not allowed to share some of the things that we think will be of real support to others?

I am going to set up a Zoom meeting this afternoon and I am going to post the link here. If it is deleted, I will let you know and I will then ask those of you who want to join it to befriend me here so that we can share the Zoom meeting link that way and I will also give you the link to the MeetUp group.

Love to all of you

Mel

What really annoys me, and has always annoyed me about this forum, is that we can't actually I was so glad to read that some of you

po18guy, I do agree with you.

Jonta, and Kenickiesmum, We are three for a group. If I, or any of you, put up a different post, asking if anyone wants to join a zoom group, we may be surprised at how many respond...or not.....After all, this is for reading, books. ...Shall I, or anyone else, try? Would any  any readers of this post give some feedback?   Zoom is different to quietly reading posts anonymously. I'm uncertain here...

I am going to set one up this afternoon. I'll start a different thread now.

My apologies for clumsiness of expression. Written words so very often fail to accurately express who and what we are, and that which we are experiencing. The trite expressions "Getting on with life" moving forward, or any other sense of expression simply cannot describe what is occurring internally. Our sense of loss, our grief is due to the amazing place they held (and still hold!) in our lives. They have been such a major portion of who we are and indeed who we have become. We were enriched, bonded together through their presence with us and their influence and contribution. In the case of marriage, it was long ago said that the two have become one - and therein lies the very nature of grief. And yet, our broken hearts are capable of and will always contain the love, the fondness, the recollection of love; of life itself.

We have all had times where we have been without words, and that is precisely because no spoken or written language can convey what is in our hearts, our minds, our souls.  More is said in a simple hand hold or hug that could be written in volumes. 

Hi Mel, and all

I’ve just picked up this thread and your message a few minutes ago as I don’t normally come on to the forum until just before bedtime, this has become my place of refuge.

I’ve sent you a friend request and would really like to join the Zoom meeting tomorrow. I’m playing golf tomorrow as this has become my only social interaction that I have with my friends. We Tee off at 2pm and have a little presentation for the winner afterwards so I may not make the start of the meeting but as soon as I get back home I’ll log on to it.

I look forward to speaking to you all tomorrow, kind regards Ian