Leaving the family home because I wasn’t married after 28 years together.

Hello Mark

this seems so unfair. Isn’t there any way that you can stay in the house? Do you have anyone that you can talk to about your feelings? If not you could ring the Samaritans or Macmillan helpline. You don’t have to go through this on your own. 
You are stronger than you think, it’s been over 7 weeks and you’re still here. 
Ive looked at ways of ending it all and there are problems with everyone and a strong possibility that you could be here in an even worse situation. 
Have you tried talking to your daughters and trying to sort a solution that you all would be in agreement with? 
keep on pushing through this xx

Mark, what a situation to be left with!

I will say straight off the bat that I have no experience of legal matters like these but, if it were me, my first call would probably be to Citizens Advice, I have found them extremely helpful in the past. And I agree with advice of Samaratins and Macmillan, really excellent support.

I hope someone can give you the advice you need. It takes incredible strength to stand up to challenges like yours, and you are, you are doing it. Huge respect. 

You’re not alone, Eryn x

Hello Mark,

No wonder you’re finding it difficult to cope anyone in the same situation would also find it difficult too. It’s bad enough you losing your best friend and soulmate Lesley but to have all of these additional worries on top of everything else, well it just seems unbearable and my heart really does go out to you.

All of the feelings you’ve expressed in your message are totally understandable and anyone of us in your position would feel exactly the same.

Please do seek help from the Samaritans or the McMillan helpline as you will get through this my friend and I do hope you find peace one day, as I hope we all do. And I agree with Eryn when she says; “You’re not alone” we all hope you find peace x

Hi Mark,

So, so sorry you have been left with all of this to cope with in addition to the loss of Lesley.

I don't know the ins and outs of your relationship with her, or whether she was in the right place to make a decision like this, but I can't even begin to imagine how this leaves you feeling.

The others here are right to urge you to seek help from CAB and MacMillan - please do.

My husband would have been in a similar situation had I died before him - the house was mine before our marriage, and my will leaves it to my children not him (he had estranged children I didn't want to have any share of the house in when he died), but I had made provision for him to be a lifetime tenant - my kids couldn't sell the house out from under him (not that they would).

Anyway - he went first, so the situation never occurred.

Maybe you could double check Lesley didn't make you a lifetime tenant?

I hope you get it sorted - keep going Mark - Sue  xxx

Just an update Last friday I did do the un thinkable and took an overdose, Fortunately one of my children knew how low i had been and asked her sister to check on me as she wasn't able to reach me on the phone.   

Things got the better of me TBH and I thought at the time I would be better off not here. After a unconscious state i was found in woke up in hospital the next day,  selfish and disappointed is what i felt on top of the rest of my feelings. Today however I had a meeting with the Mental health team at one of the local centres where I live. They are helping me with some tablets and counselling. Which I hope will help me.  I did'n know how Cancer could affect a person with out it. It's a terrible thing for anyone to have and hope that all of you don't encounter what harsh decisions My partner made before she died. thank you for your support Mark.

Mark xx  

I don't really know what to say, I am hoping your counsellor is better equipped than I am. 

I do know a little what it feels like just to want an end to it all where you don't have to feel anything. Me, I would rather feel pain and anguish than the alternative. 

Nothing about cancer  is your fault Mark. Nothing.

I've had it  twice now and am okay. My husband got it and died 5 months from diagnosis. That wasn't his fault either. 

Guy, you are doing everything you can and believe me, you can get through it and come out the other side.

Hang on in there - sending love Sue xxx

Mark,

I’m so pleased you’re alive and you’ve reached out to people that can help you rebuild your life again. I truly wish you good health and I hope you find peace my friend.

Ian x

Lifes crap.

Sending strength

Donna