Hard day

Hi Alison 

sorry for your loss and too here your news the big c catch es you unaware never know how quick it can be or long 

you were doing so well being positive and moving forward 

take care 

martin x

Hi Alison

Same here, i had a call friend of ours died early hours of Friday morning have known  them for a very long time.

So it hit home as well coming up for the first Anniversary for me also our Wedding Anniversary 7 days apart

Been a hard year all round for so many people.

Take care Ellie xx

Hi Ellie 

you cope so well Ellie I manage to do all my jobs today without giving up that made a change 

time goes past so quick if you are busy  as we all try to be 

take care 

Martin x

LOL Martin i am getting worn out by keeping busy, but nearly there.

Glad you got your jobs done, i have to say i have not done anything really indoors spent nearly every day in the garden but i am starting to see that it has paid of.

Been so nice here today nice breeze was o hot at start of week for me, the sun is in the garden all day.

How you been doing other wise, i am getting there starting to realise i am on my own now, i do not like it but have to except it have no choice.

Take Care Elliexx

Very sorry to hear this Alison...that’s just not fair. Look after yourself. 

Hi Ellie 

you must have the best garden you have been in the garden for months staying busy are boys still helping with the big jobs 

I’m tired too still don’t sleep properly  

when you have to do everything yourself  I realised I don’t like the loneliness either or being on my own I hate it at least I’m honest  when I have a bad day at work I can’t ring her up so she can say calm down  

still waiting to see if they will give me a job on nite trunking 

Take care 

Martin x

The garden is really looking good if i say so my self, but it has been hard.

No the boys have disappeared a while back, to busy working, but the brick wall is all lose and that job i ccannot do.

It is surprising what one can do i even fixed a door today i have hidden talents lol. 

I do not like the being on my own, he always to me for hospital appointment and scan results doing that without him is hard.

I do not like some one being around and your alone, have not spoke to anyone all day, no wonder i talk to my self.

Lets hope you do not have to wait to long Martin if you think it will be better for you.

The nights are starting to draw in. i did last winter and hated it was such a long evening.

On a brighter note, i have noticed that since Tom is not here i am in charge of the remote control

, mind you i had to learn how to use it, i think it was glued to his hand.

Take Care Elliexx

Hi Ellie 

today I saw my mum for tens minutes when I drop her off in town she did not ring me tonight either and spoke to my neighbour we are going fishing Tuesday he has to speak to his consultant  Wednesday he has prospate cancer have the week off

some weekends do not speak to any one so I know how you feel you get a better answer talking to yourself lol 

I don’t have ask what is happening in the soaps and I just watch films most of the time now  listen to bit of music burst into tears now and again wrong song wrong film 

the winter dark morning dark evening like when the spring come and nites draw back out 

take care 

martin x

Martin that is good if you get to go fishing on Tuesday the weather is suppose to change towards the end of the week,

I am the same with music can sing along one minuet then another time same song in tears.

No one would have thought this tie last year this is what  we would be going through.

It is so hard but in time how ever long it takes we will get there.

I have to say i have changed a little since being on my own, i am learning to stick up for my self some thing i never did, as Tom was always there and sort things out.

Have a good day tomorrow and speak soon.

Take Care Ellie xx

Thank you everyone. I think it was just a bit close to home. I won't loose my positivity. Hannah has her first driving lesson today. I have been taking her to the aerodrome to get the basics and we had a practice yesterday again. She is pretty good but I don't want to teach her bad habits! She needs to decide on which car she wants to buy and then we can get on the road! 

I have 4 days in a row off so want to relax a bit! Had lots of busy busy again lately and my back hurts. My hours increase soon! I may as well be paid to be busy. I have done so much in the house now with my dad's help with the outside stuff! Garden is nearly finished. I have changed my mind about the arbour and going to deck it instead as it is a bit of a sun trap there. Dad has the fence to repair where the tree pushed it out a bit but plans in place and he is going to repair another arbour Ric made on Thursday.

Then I only have my hallway and stairs to do but I am going to get a decorator in for that as it has woodchip on the wall and I hate it and it will be too much for me. 

So cooking a nice roast today and relaxing.... For a change.

I think Ellie you do the same as me and keep busy, we seem to have a few things in common. Martin I am glad you seem more positive and are fishing again. Winter is a bit miserable but once we have done one it will be easier.

I am going for a drink again tonight, I want to let the guy down gently but he is pretty persistent. If he doesn't take it face to face it will have to be a no by txt.

Have a good Sunday everyone

Love and hugs Alison xxx