I wasn't going to post this but...

hi mccmcc You ain't bonkers at all after the passing of Carla your missing the woman you love everyday. I'm still crying everyday think it can become a habit with me ? Thought you'd like a you are Human .

Thank you sunny, It was a really weird thing I was simply unable to stop it..

Hi I have been through that many times I think it is like a pressure relief valve if not I think we would just explode with grief 

Hi I am new to the forum, but I saw your post and I just wanted to say i don't think are bonkers or having a breakdown.. just human. I am only relatively new to the grieving process (lost my fiancé just under 3 months ago) but I get set off by the most random things and sometimes they are very full on.

You mean I might have to go through it again?? Cripes, seriously though I've actually garnered the bottle to attend a barbecue today and am just back,last to arrive and first to leave but hey ho, its a step...

I understand this part of it, I'm six weeks in and there are far too many reminders of Carla here, especially when I change something she had done that got on my nerves, (towel storage and bedding etc) but then it brings it back..

Hang on in there..

Being a bit bonkers might not be a bad idea though?

Hi there, I know exactly what you have experienced as I've had such moments too and I would not dare to say that I won't experience something like this again. To me it always seems like when we dissolve into tears like that it helps us to process and it is the moving from one level of going to the next order from one Very hard moment into an easier one and till, yet again, we will have one of those very difficult moments. For me it came one day when I was sitting where our Christmas tree had been and I 70 realised that Paul would never be there with me ever again and I cried and cried and cried but afterwards I felt very calm and very excepting of the situation. And this is only one example. But coming to a little more acceptance is certainly a good thing and in joy the calm feeling for now. Well, enjoy is probably not the right word, but do you know what I mean.
Love Mel

You may potentially need to go through something similar  to it again. I believe grieving is very individual though and it may be different for you. I just know it is something i have experienced. I do find it is like a relief valve as Ian says though. I tend to feel a bit better afterwards. 

It's good you got out though and saw people even if only for a little while. I find seeing people and being around people helps me, even if sometimes I would rather hide from the world. 

mccmcc - glad you posted this. Triggers and the unexpected. I  notice the unexpectedness. So for me, even more important to have this as an outlet as these moments catch us and may be hard to share with non bereavers.  Reminds me how close to the surface things can be, even if slightly out of sight. Caught myself suddenly bursting into a big cry gulp choke at someone getting through to the next round on a shite tv programme, or stubbing my toes on my partners old boots. 

Yeah definitely.

I understand where your coming from with sharing with non bereaved. I have had an amazing support network from my friends and family in the last few months, but I haven't really been able to share my full experiences with them, as I don't feel it is easy to explain when its something they have not experienced.