Overwhelming loss of the love of your life - from one Big C to another.....

Gary and V , I also empathise with both your journeys  , I wa married to my wife Winnie for 43 years, we met each other the year before, I was 21 she was 23. In all those years we were never apart. In 2017 she was diagnosed with melanoma, we honestly thought we would beet it , but sadly after operations and radiotherapy it spread to her brain last June. Like you I did everything for her at home. , and that gives me great comfort. Unfortunately she passed away on 15 July. 9 months ago. I still think about her all the time , talk to her photo and have a cry everyday. 
it just seems so hard that our future was taken away. All out plans just gone. I can’t see any future now , not even living just existing from one day to the next 

Winnie was Irish, so when we retired early , we sold up in uk and built a house in Ireland, we both loved this house , and this is the house she died in , it gives me so much comfort to see her things around me , I keep it the same way she kept it. And try and keep the garden to her standards. 

for me 9 months on it definitely isn’t getting any easier. The only thing that keeps me going is I am positive we will meet again. 

I even went to a medium a few weeks ago ( I was very sceptical about that kind of thing ) it was a Skype reading and she was in Canada.

she told me things that only Winnie and I would know. She knew what car I have , where I keep all the keys. And even that I used to be in the Royal Navy for 5 years before I met my wife. She also said a lot of other things , all which were correct. I am very glad I did it as it seems to bring me closer to her. 
sorry about the long post. 
hope you are all having a good a day as you can. 
Mike.