1 week

Oh BootsyD

It is early days for you and i fill your pain, we all have had to re live the last moment's and there is nothing that will help you threw this at this early stage,but we are all here for you and will hold you up.

I was where you are and i know how you are feeling. Its six months since i lost my hubby, and things are getting a little easier it takes time, and that is the way forward one day at a time.

I still relive certain aspects of my hubbies journey and the build up it is part of the memories we have  of them.  We have to go threw terrible heartache to get to the other side, and slowly the good memories come back, well they did for me.

I loved him  all my life and he me and that will never die.

Please take care and here for you.

Elliexx

hi bootsy I'm so sorry for your loss at this moment in time I don't like thinking back to the passing it makes me just cry and wish I had done this and that truth is I panicked I wish I didn't . Sending you strength and courage and lots of hugs .

Got sent into a spin today when the funeral directors rang with a date for Colins burial (a funeral it isn't) Mon at 1.30. 8 mourners allowed at the cemetery, there's 10 immediate family for starters! I know for fact there will be some friends hovering about on the day. I don't like Mondays anymore! 

Got sent into a spin today when the funeral directors rang with a date for Colins burial (a funeral it isn't) Mon at 1.30. 8 mourners allowed at the cemetery, there's 10 immediate family for starters! I know for fact there will be some friends hovering about on the day. I don't like Mondays anymore! 

Hi Boots,

I guess it all happened a bit quickly if you had paramedics. I had the same. Wanting me to resuscitate Ric because we hadn't got around to the DNR. It was all too fast. I knew what they were doing as I am a nurse. This was 28/12. I am still angry and left a mess as well as him dead on the floor! I found all sorts of kit and it was a struggle to deal with it. I still see his face as I found him. They rushed in and were then gone! They were nice enough but still carried on! 

It is hard to get rid of that nightmare. It is not as you.imagine and I couldn't hold his hand as promised! I have put my favourite photo by the bed to ease the memory and it had helped. And changed my bedding, bought new which has helped for nightmares. 

I was fortunate with the funeral obviously and was able to have what he wanted but I am stuck with scattering his ashes as I was going to do it first weekend in Apr as it meant something to him. Try to get the funeral broadcast/ recorded for friends, a couple of Ric's friends have recently passed and that was done. It may help a little. 

You can have a memorial service after. I know it won't be quite the same.

Take care, lots of love and hugs Alison xxx

Oh my word!! How dreadful for you! And I thought my reliving that night was bad! I did get to hold Colins hand and I am so glad for that. He did bleed heavily from his nose and mouth and I can't even remember what the nurses said when they came back soon after, I just grabbed towels for under his chin to clean up that mess. 

I'm not sure about recording the service. 

Some kind of 'do' will happen later. His 4 sons will see to that!!

I hope you get to deal with Ric's ashes. You can always keep him closer to you for another year.

Love

Sandra D

Hi Sandra, 

Your experience is no less traumatic than mine if it upsets you Hun and I didn't have this covoid element. 

I can understand if you want to keep your service private. It is so hard. There was one or two at Ric's who I would have preferred to stay away!!! But I couldn't say that!!! Not to a place of worship anyway. 

I hope you get to say goodbye in the best way possible. Life is so unfair sometimes. 

Stay strong. You are doing a great job.

Love and hugs Alison xxx

Dreading tomorrow.   

I hope all goes as well as it can.

Thinking about you.

Lots of love Alison xxx

Sandra,

Thinking of you today. The sun is shining down on you. Be strong.

Ali x