Eulogy to husband

Apologies for typos 

*our time before cancer 

*came to fruit 

Hi Messymum,

I also wrote the Eulogy for my husband but I wasn't able to read it at the funeral, someone else read it for me. It was hard but at the same time it was the opportunity for me to write a tribute to the man I loved more than life itself, I wanted the world to know how I felt about him, what we meant to each other and how his death affected me. I found this liberating and I put my heart and soul into it. 

It is difficult and devastating but try, if you can, to think about the day you met, what attracted you to him, what did you love about your husband, how did he make you feel.  What kind of man he was, what he liked or didn't, remember the day he proposed, and then the wedding day, what was the day like for you and him? Even with the cancer being around  you didn't allow illness to define you, you still had your dreams and future to look forward to, you can write about that if you wish. Then, at the end talk about the struggle, fight, all the devastation and heartbreak  that you felt and feeling right now. 

You do have a beautiful, although heartbreaking story to tell and you'll do it well. Remember, your love was there before the cancer and the same love survived the bloody cancer. That love you had for each other will never leave you. That is one thing this wicked, horrible illness couldn't  take away from you. 

Big hug

Dalia xx

I think you are immensely brave to do this. I wrote something for my husband’s funeral but I had someone else read it because I felt I wouldn’t be able to. Actually on the day I was weirdly calm and could have done so. You might ask someone to be ready to step in if you can’t. Dalia has given lots of great ideas about what to write. I hope it all goes smoothly and is a beautiful day to honour your lovely husband. Look after yourself x 

I wrote my husband's but had the celebrant read it, myself and my sons were too upset to read it. A good friend read a poem she had wrote it was very hard but incredibly moving. Looking back cancer had been there for almost 1/2 our time together as well first diagnosed 2003, treated and no sign until 2018 when it returned. I focused on all the things he did and we did despite cancer. there are struggles and daemons and that's how I referred to the not great bits. All the best for his funeral. 

Dear Messymum

Already such support and great advice. My husband had 6 months with me before he passed on in March 2019, it gave us both time to reflect on our lives of 32 years together. He wanted to take control of his own funeral and we both wrote his eulogy which the Humanist read at the funeral. It reflected every stage of our lives together, the beginning, middle and end. Common factor was the love we had for our family and each other.

Be kind to yourself and have a reliable plan B if it all gets too much for you on the day. I wish you well, stay strong.

Lots of love xxx

Dalia, thank you so, so much. Your really was perfect and really helped. I took myself off and thought about our time together and just poured it out on paper. A lot of editing later and it’s done.

Now I just have to get through the funeral x

Little update - I not only wrote it but somehow had the strength to read it. I wobbled a bit, I had my sister’s hand on my back ready to take over but I did it and I am so proud of myself. Thank you x

I really admire you for finding the strength and courage to read your Eulogy, that must have been so hard. You should be very proud of yourself and I'm sure your husband would've been proud of you too.

Big hug x

Dalia 

You are amazing - remember this moment when you have a wobble - you are right to be proud and he would be too x