Getting Stronger

Hi Mary,

As you say you do get stronger; there are moments of sadness and these will probably be always there.

I am in Tenerife with a friend. It is not the same but learning to relax in a different way. Had a little cry earlier reminiscing about the old times.

No one truly knows what lies ahead ever, so choosing to make the most of now. As you say, trying to live the best you can.

I took the plunge and arranged a last minute holiday. For me, it focused me to meet some work and personal deadlines. Finally, finished probate forms some 8 months later - should have got some help! Anyway, we all do things in our own time but feel lighter for addressing matters that I could not concentrate on before.

Take care of yourself too, Mary. Good to hear from you.

With lots of love,

Dutsie Xx

Hi ladies

We do get stronger, alittle less sad but always lonely that's what I'm feeling.

Well done Dutsie with all you have achieved and being on holiday. Me and our children have had afew holidays and it's so difficult to not just cry. Our first time away I couldn't watch Dad's playing in the pool with their children. That was my Robs role. I got to sunbath and he splashed and generally tried to dunk anyone who got in his way!!

I will miss him forever but I am able to get through days without crying now and when I do it's usually out of frustration that he's not here to make things better, mend things, like my lap top, silly things that I just took for granted that he would do!

I also read all the posts and feel the pain and sadness from everyone who is just starting this long journey. Hopefully that can trust us when we say the pain does get easier but everyone's journey is different and it takes as long as it takes.

Hi Mary59 and the others,

Yes I feel that too. Over time, the feelings change. There is still a lot of sadness and I miss Paul every day, but I have come to accept that it is as it is and that I have to live my life now as best I can. I go to work. I socialise with people and have found really good friends. I keep myself active. And when the sadness and missing Paul get very strong I have a little cry and that's okay too. At first I didn' know how I was ever going to cope with the loneliness, but I learned to cope, I had to learn it, and so will everyone else here on this site sooner or later.

Mel.