Struggling

Hi,

The situation with mental health is enough to send you mad. I had to wait 5 years and by then I everything had gotten worse. It seems that the part of the NHS that misses out on the cash even the stuff that's supposed to be designated for them is mental health. It seems to be a case of if you can't see or measure it its not there.

D

Hi Limbo,

Yes what seems like a good idea at the time may turn out to be a mistake, you may hate the site of the flat you shared at the moment but you may feel differently when you sell it. It could feel like another loss because you will be cutting the tie between yourself and something the two of you shared. Give it a bit more time, while its rented its not a burden.

D

Hi Newb 

You've summed it up perfectly. 

Hope one day we'll feel differently, somehow. 

I wish it happens soon this sat I'm taking the dogs to the crematorium hope she is watching they were her baby's lots of tears and then home to TV and silence

Hi Newb 

Take comfort from your dogs, as they will keep you going. I lost our Milly 2 months after Jayne died and believe me I'm utterly lost twice over. 

My father in law says you never get used to being alone, you just adjust to it. That thought keeps running through my mind constantly. I'm 54 and the thought of 20 odd years of living alone, fills me dread. Adjusting to living alone is bad enough, as for being happy again one day. Can't honestly see it. 

I'd love another dog, but it's impossible with my shift pattern. Walking alone without my wife and the dog, is still torture. But I have to force myself to do it. 

I'm off work next week and I don't know how I'm going to fill the lonely empty hours. 

Happyness is for other's, my happiness died with my wife. 

Hi Limbo, 

Thank you for the morning wishes to us all. 

I went to work today. Doing my second week now, after being off for a few months. Lost my concentration quickly, then they let me go home at 2.30pm. A colleague made a cake at home, so she brought me a piece to take home. 

I will take your advise on board. Will keep the allotment but only half of the plot. It will give me something to do and i know, gardening is relaxing and good for our mind. And people there are nice and friendly. 

I have been reading the thread about alcohol. I myself don't drink at all. If this  is,  what gives people a bit of comfort and relief, then it's their choice. I find comfort in chocolate. We all are different, but what we all here have in common is, that we all need something, what gives us comfort. 

I had a nice surprise tonight. A friend rung me, that she is arround and will pop in with her daughter. So we had a nice chat and it filled the emptiness for a little bit. 

I wish us all a good night sleep and a better day tomorrow. 

Hugs and xx

Andrea xx

Hi Mark, 

Its a shame, you cannot have another dog, because of your shift pattern.

We never had any pets. Its because we both left for work at early morning hours and didn't get back till late and we thought, it would be unfair on them.

Maybe try to do a little list of things to do for next week. It does not have to be a long one. But when you get up in the morning, it will give you something to focus on. Whether its something in the household, or outdoor. Have you got a swimming pool nearby?  I went to one a couple of times before i went back to work. I am not saying, i did enjoy it without my husband, but it was better, then sitting at home lonely. You may find people to talk to. I also do a bit of wordsearch. It keeps my mind occupied especially in the evening when i am in bed.

I hope, you will find something to destruct you next week. 

Remember, we are always here to chat. 

Take care

Hugs and xx

Andrea

Hi Andrea 

I'll probably do plenty of walking and visiting Jaynes dad. Visit my dad (88). It won't be an enjoyable week off, but I'll do my best duck. 

Hi Mark, 

It may not be enjoyable, but definitely do the best you can for yourself and for the memory of your beloved wife Jayne.

Take care

Those of you who work will I hope find it helpful to have something to take up your time.