Struggling

The silence in the house is killing. I can only hear the mantel piece clock. The hearse is coming at 10.15 am.

I am feeling sick. My heart is beating faster and faster. 

What do i do? My emotions are taking me over completely. 

Andrea

Andrea

Let your emotions flow free.  This is as much about you as it is for your dear man. Our emotions are the most honest part of our very being. Express them with love.

Bless. Geoff

Just to send love, a hug and to say I am thinking of you on this really tough day.   I found the anticipation of the day was worse than the actual day but having said that, it is still the hardest day imaginable.  So as Geoff say let your emotions flow.  No one will expect you to be anything but heartbroken.  And the day will pass as every day does.  

Love Sue 

This is the day for emotion, you won't be alone

D

Hope you get through the day . Just let things happen, I am sure it will go well. And hopefully you will get some sleep tonight. Take care.

Mike

There would be no point D. Im 73 so the chances of being resusitated successful would be very slim anyway.  And a very good chance if it did work Id be anything from a disabled man to a cabbage

And  CPR isn't like you see on the TV. It can be brutal process and rarely successful  any way. ( I got that information from a nurse I know.) 

Bless. Geoff

Andrea just cry your eyes out no one will think any less of you I did when was at the funeral it helps the emotions settle my heart breaks for you 

Geoff I to have ordered a do not resuscitate bracelet I to know how rough it is the cpr  hope they obey the bracelet instructions

Dear Andrea,

i’ve been thinking about you all day, I truly hope the day is as bearable as it can be and that you are shown love and support to help you get through it. We will be here tonight to listen. God bless you and God bless your precious Rob.

Fiona xxx

Hi Fiona, Mark

Thank you for your supportive words. 

Its been the worst day in my life and do not know whether the pain i feel will ever eas. My friends supported me. Now i have learnt who the true friends are. 

The hotel my Rob worked for has offered me a room for tonight so i am staying in one of the guest rooms. The wake was held here organized by Rob's colleagues. They did an excellent job. As my husband worked here for over 15 years, the hotel has decided to rename the biggest function room in my husbands name. 

The family is still downstairs having drinks in the bar area. But i cannot be bothered to join them. Just lying on bed surrounded by Rob's pictures and reading messages from members of this group. 

My stomach has been in knots for weeks. Trying to take deep breaths but doesn't seem to help.

I cannot find myself a motivation and don't fancy  to join people who don't know how we feel. 

I want to talk to my Rob. Want to feel him. But all I can feel is emptiness. 

I hope we all will see better days one day. 

Sending my love to you all 

Andrea