Seeing an image

Peter, everyone on here watched their loved ones dying.  It won’t keep replaying, it won’t last forever.  Push it away from your mind and think of happier memories.  It may be hard to think of happy memories at the moment, but given time they will return and you will find yourself smiling at them.  Give yourself some time peter and think what Lindsey would want you to be doing.  Take care of you as Lindsey would want you to do and Mollie too.  Sending you strength to give yourself the time you need to heal. Love Dolly xx

Well said Dolly.

We all watched our loved ones die.

My children watched their big strong Dad loose so much weight, cry out in pain and have such a haunted look in his eyes. It was extremely traumatic.

But we have have to push those images away, remember the smiling images, the better times. It's so hard for us all .

All we can do is keep going for us and our loved ones.

Well said Dolly.

We all watched our loved ones die.

My children watched their big strong Dad loose so much weight, cry out in pain and have such a haunted look in his eyes. It was extremely traumatic.

But we have have to push those images away, remember the smiling images, the better times. It's so hard for us all .

All we can do is keep going for us and our loved ones.

Despite other comments I didn't see my husband die.  I woke to find him gone totally unexpected. 

I do have flashbacks though to finding him and as you say it's awful.  We can only hope that in time we can remember the good times. 

Everybody keeps saying remember the good times and the smiles but after 8 months I still see Cath in those last few horrible weeks before she passed. I remember her asking for more pain meds to make it stop and every time I try to remember the fabulous holidays we had and our time together those images return to haunt me. They say time heals.....I hope so. Sorry to be negative but it's been one of those days when I really miss her.

It's been nearly two years and I see my wife dieing all the time, I have images intruding my mind of her in her last moments, others of her mental anguis and others when because she died at home and the doctors messed up I see the police lots of them trying to get me to let them take her away. All I wanted to do was be alone with my wife as her beautiful soul left her cancer ravageged body. They treated it as an unexpected death because she died at home and the police even inspected her body for evidence of foul play. They turned her naked and skelital body over, I asked them what they were doing and they said checking to see if there was a thing sticking in her back, to see if I killed her.

Sorry I digress. I have flash backs, I'm so messed up by watching my wife die I hardly get out of bed. This is two years on. I have tried to get help from the doctors and wellbieng services. I have recieved nothing except anti depressants. You need to try and get help and I hope you have more luck than I have had.

Unless one has seen a soulmate loved one or god forbid a child die so horribly they could never imaging the traumer. It's not depressing it is so so much more, I had depression all my adult life but this that we go through is more like post traumatic syndrum.

I'm going to the doctors to demand they take me seriously tommow. 

The truth is ill proberly lay in bed and cry as usual. 

It's auful what we go through after watching our loved ones suffer so much. 

Rolf

I really hope that you manage to get an appointment with your GP to get some help.

Flashbacks are awful, they seem so real.

I t seems there are a lot of people suffering. 

It's so bloody unfair. I think there should be more support. I know without some sort of help I will be a lose to society, if for know other reason that I can get back to work.

I think bereavment is a very misunderstood  and underestimated part of mental health.. 

I phoned a non NHS Councillor earlier, I'm gonna give that a try. I need to get my self together for the sake of my kids and grand kids. 

All the best luck to all of you. One way we can keep on trying to pick our selves  up is by remembering our loved one would hate to see us in pain. And by talking to each other and sharing our pain. Wow that's easy to say ain't it but bloody hard to do. 

Xxx