Still struggling more than 2 years after mum's death

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I lost my wonderful mum over 2 years ago after she fought so hard for 3 years.

The last 6 weeks of her life were awful and I still have nightmares about it. The doctors made countless mistakes, consultants were obnoxious and they refused to allow her to go to a Hospice. After she died I was left alone in a room with her for 7 hours. None of the staff came to see me despite them knowing I was there.

During her treatment I was her sole carer which led to epilepsy due to the extreme stress which has since resulted in a recent mini stroke.

I'm totally on my own now and am really struggling.

Sorry if this post is rambling