15 months on and still struggling

FormerMember over 5 years ago

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I lost my Dad over a year ago and have struggled ever since. My overwhelming feelings are of guilt that I may not have done what was best for him at the very end and sadness that I will never see him again. Sometimes I can go a whole 4 - 5 hours without thinking about him but some days the grief takes over and I realise life will never be the same again. Is it normal to still feel like this after 15 months? I feel like I should have moved on with life by now.

LoobyLou49 over 5 years ago

Hi , I noticed your post was unanswered and just popped over from Carers. My mum died very suddenly and there was no time for anything; no goodbyes nor a chance to say I loved her and I regretted it for years. It was so sudden that I suffered from PTSD for ages. Moving on is not the way I see it, rather it's coming to terms with the way things are and that we can't change the past. I lost a friend very quickly too and sometimes I can hear her say, 'Come on girl' and telling me to cheer myself up. Perhaps that's what your dad would say too. Fifteen months is not so long when you think of how many years you had with him. I'm emotional and it takes me a lot longer than many to get over family deaths; that's just the way I am and I accept myself for what I am. Cut yourself some slack; no 'should' or 'must' just be who you are and let yourself heal in your own time.

Sending huge hugs,

LoobyLou
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15 months on and still struggling