PET Scans.

Hello movingtables, Andrew firstly I just want to send my sincere condolences for your lose of your Dad. How very different in such a short time for it being only a small ulcer to it being widespread and mets to the liver too. Scans only seem to tell one side of a story it seems, I have heard before about things not showing in the scans or mis interpreted its always difficult to know why this has happened. I do feel you may feel you want to know how they missed the stomach cancer or was it so aggressive and you may feel the need to asked these questions for closer, you want to know that everything was done correct and if mistakes have happened why. It sadly doesn't make the person come back but sometimes you need those answers. 

Have you got support at home? Please if you haven't and you need some help apart from the Macmillan helpline who can put you in touch with support but also your local information center which maybe based at the hospital. But you can find this out online too on the main Macmillan site and click 'in your area'. You have a lot to come to terms with. 

Sending you a gentle hug

Hi thank you for the reply GBear.

although i only signed up the other day i have been here for roughly 4months

and these forums have given me so much comfort.

I suppose what i want most now is for people who are suspected

to have cancer to skip to a PET scan rather than all the other inferior scans.

I accept it wont bring my dad back but I'd like to think it would help others.

support wise i am coping and I've returned to work. i miss my dad a lot

and i feel it's awful he got this cancer as the injustice of it all is that i think at aged 75

he had another good 10 years in him but who knows.

I have a very logical outlook on death as i see it for what it is, we want our loved ones

to live for ever but it simply just doesn't work like that.

we are simply born and we simply pass on.

I work in a care home for the elderly and i tell people in life now that they should just eat and drink what they like because you don't want to end up with dementia for 5 to 20 years sitting in what is basically a waiting room for death.

I bought my dad a beautiful memorial bench (solid teak) for my garden with a name plate on it in his memory. i will sit on it and read all his kindle books and that will feel lovely.

I see a lot of pain on here by relatives/friends and although i feel a big (BIG) loss i know my dad is always part of me as I'm simply wearing his DNA

To others reading and experiencing great loss please take a step back

and give yourself a break and be kind to yourself.

we are simply paying the price for losing the people we loved so much as they were such great people and for that i am enterally grateful x

movingtables, Hello again Andrew what you say does make so much sense. I never had a PET scan before my diagnosis it was an ultrasound that although showed a problem it wasn't investigated fully for many months later, I feel blessed that in the end my cancer was only low stage and considering it had developed into a large mass I again feel blessed and lucky I only had to have a hysterectomy in my case as treatment but I do feel that although I was lucky others sadly are not and I do thibk sometimes it would cost less in the end to investigate fully straight away. So I really appiecate what your saying about PET scans they clearly see move and like you say help so many others.  Have you put a complaint in at the hospital though PALS? About what had happened with your Dad, like you said its not going to bring him back but it would I hope as you say help others. Its awful having to do these things but awareness is so important. I am sure in your job you have seen many things, my Mum before she retired used to work in a care home and she encouraged them all to live life to the full, and why not we only live once. I love the idea of your bench you have in your garden in memory of your Dad its a lovely idea and a place you can seat and be close to him. Your right that we should give ourselves a break and be kind to ourselves, everyday. I have suffered loss by cancer and had cancer and currently supporting a friend who is terminal and it makes you look at life different. Having had cancer myself I definitely look at life different and yes I do struggle with my emotions but we are human and at times I take things too personal but I always feel we all need some time for ourselves just to focus on looking after our own wellbeing and I am glad you have found the community a comfort, its surprising too how many join and just read the posts and think yes I can relate to that and I get it, its good to know that there is others who really understand. We may all react different to loss, or other traumas but here there is always someone who understands.

Thanks GBear for your kind and detailed reply.

I'll have a good think about what you have said.

also sorry for your loss.

take care and stay well

Andrew x

movingtables,

Your very welcome Andrew, I am sorry again for your loss but I am glad I could help you and remember to take care of yourself too.