The page in the book I never wanted to read.....

Today I decided I was going to stay strong and try my hardest not to cry. Kids off to school and jugs of water thrown down my neck ready for my pet scan. I have to say it was a big shock walking in, I was the youngest person there and reality hit when I seen other patients who had already been through chemo and were showing the side effects. I can only describe the feeling as OMG this is real, this is really happening…

Today has been a much better day. Very little tears and a get things done attitude. I eventually went out and bought new curtain poles for my front room after they fell down in February oops! It will be nice not having the room look bare and feel cold without them. I bought some more presents for my daughters birthday and started to sort some of my craft stuff ready for a little craft room. Never realised I had so much…

My morning started off pretty much the same as it has for the past week. I wake about 6.30 thinking s*** it isn't a dream and it's still very real. I have cancer. What a nasty thing to even exist in the world. A quick google of any aches and pains I have, quick check of this site and then the email in the hope of that email telling me I've won big on the lottery. Can pay for all this to be done swiftly and receive…

Op date finally arrives. Life can get back to normal. I can become a mum and lover yet again after being drugged up on pain killers and stuck in bed for months. Very successful op! Tumour removed weighed in at just under 2 stone. Recovery going well. I can move, I am pain free at long last! The the phone rings.......your consultant wants to see you.... The biopsy is back and shows cancer. The surgeon…