Another pants night trying to find a comfortable position to lie and get some sleep but managed at last to fall off about 3 ish (seems to be the new witchinh hour for me these days) and was rudely woken at 5.45 by hubby's new all singing all beeping alarm clock. Managed to be civil and shared a coffee before he departed for his daily drive into London and went back upstairs witht eh idea of geting maybe just another hour…
Saturday 26th Oct
Not too bad a day all in all, had the luxury of a lie in and then spent a lazy day with my 3 yr old watchin buckets if CBeebies, am now findin that this thing that has decided to enter my life without an invite does play games with your mind, I discovered a lump at the top of my leg last nite and immediately flew into a blind panic, othe half still making his way home so sos phone call made to mum in…
Well now I know, not the news I wanted but I can't change that so have decided on how to move forward. Since I have all the facts now and know this is not going to be a short run thing I have decided to do this blog bit correctly like Deb's and Andrew (wonderful people with a wicked sense of humour). This in my mind is now my day 1 and the dance and cance is deliberate...not typo error.
Spent all yesterday feeling…
Well I finally got the results, 9 nodes removed one showing affected, lumpectory showed receptors right to the end of lump so mastectomy and chemo advised. Head all over the place and hubby asking all the relevant questions, me meantime sitting breathing like I was in labour and having hot flushes. The Mac nurse is asking me if I want to see pictures of mastectomy, me shaking my head but still remembering my manners …
Since my courageous and very stupid decision to try work on Monday I have really been suffering. Well I couldnt ring the mac nurses and tell them of my stupidity could I so decided to suffer in silence (no probs going to hospital Thursday would mention pain then...)
Have not managed to get any sleep for two nights and last night even had to vacate my lovely bed because every time my other half so much as even flickered…
