After he has gone.......

Felt too awful to post a day 24! Today I went to work for a few hours and whilst I had a major mess to sort out as I have been off for 6 weeks, I felt a little better for going. Cried my eyes out before I went this morning as I cannot get my head round "normal" and work felt too normal for me for now. Tomorrow I will try again and see how that goes. Problem I have at the moment is I don't want to talk to anyone, i…

What an awful night, 2hours sleep in total and a very tearful day today. I feel reality is starting to kick in, funeral over, considering work for a few hours this week as I haven't been for 6 weeks I need some money, and the its Easter, family time! What a joke that is, no one to buy me an egg, no one to bring me a cuppa in bed, no one to make gravy.....the list is endless which is exactly how today has felt!

My husband passed away 22 days ago as the title suggests....he had Mesothelioma and battled for a relatively short time but there again he had a lot to battle with! So I find myself 3 days after his funeral wondering what do I do now, I am so used to the carer then organiser role that I feel redundant! Time is passing very slowly and I never noticed before just how many people, including friends, are part of a unit..…