What an awful night, 2hours sleep in total and a very tearful day today. I feel reality is starting to kick in, funeral over, considering work for a few hours this week as I haven't been for 6 weeks I need some money, and the its Easter, family time! What a joke that is, no one to buy me an egg, no one to bring me a cuppa in bed, no one to make gravy.....the list is endless which is exactly how today has felt!
FormerMember
Hi....I havent been on this site for quite a while, but its my partners anniversary and i just feel the need to connect with others who have been there!!!
After reading your blog, i felt compeled to write to you as you sound so down and at your wits end. I too felt like that 4 years ago when my partner passed, everything felt so pointless. I felt angry at everyone, that they had " someone" and i didnt...(my mum had also died less than a year when i lost my partner). All these feelings are quite normal, although at the time, i felt like there was only me who had suffered like that.
Although you still need time to grieve, i felt it quite useful returning to work....i went back 2 weeks post funeral. If you have good colleagues it can be beneficial inretuning yourself to some sort of normality. Life will never be the same again, but it can be good again, but just in a different way. Try to make some plans.....just little steps....a trip to hairdressers maybe....or a meal at a friends.
Sorry if this hasnt been useful, but just want to say, you are not alone and you will get through this.
Thank you Kathryn, your comments do help a lot as I can see there will be a light at the end of the tunnel one day, nights are the worst for me as in the day I try to keep busy but at night I can't. I hope you had a good day yesterday and as you say life will never be normal again, I will try to look for the good things
Wendy x
